Kalim_a

Option 2 for me too and i do believe he will be future England international. For the last few years, the one thing I could not understand about Wenger was not giving Taylor the no 1 jersey. He is an excellent keeper.

Nobby Solano, has been quality throughout the season and without his goals we would have been seriously struggling... Hard to choose anyone else really, Mellberg has been a rock but not his best due to being having too many different defensive partners. Steve Davis would get the best youth player... Hendrie had the spark in the early season but faded out... Delaney wouldn't get it for too much moaning about contracts and missing alot through injuries... Barry has shown form only after christmas... Hitz, who I thought was going to be the most improved player this season has hardly improved...UDLC has done ok. McCann has missed too much to injury...

Excellent question. I voted Hendrie, don't ask me why!!! Hendrie always had potential, and has played better this season then the previous one's he's played in!. Solano cannot be really counted as he came in mid season last season and wasn't match fit nor ready for our grill training Delaney has been out too long to be choice... McCann has been out for a while but has played his normal game. Barry is just begining to show what he's capable of Davis has just broken into the team this season... Guess it is Ridgewell. He seems better to be playing with Laursen than Mellberg! Though it was just 45 mins.

Adolf, Benito, Francisco, Douglas....McGrath-is-God!!!! Why you are forcing us with our choices? why cant we have "no - ellis in"?!?!!!! I Don't know what the world is comming to...

Pure class Rob, keep em cumming

True Speeding Ticket Stories: GOOD: A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting many. Then he discovered the problem - a 10-year-old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign, which read "RADAR TRAP AHEAD". The officer then found a young accomplice down the road with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket full of change. (And we used to just sell lemonade.) BETTER: A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar post. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo of handcuffs. BEST: A young woman was pulled over for speeding. As the motorcycle officer walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the Highway Patrolmen's Ball. "He replied, "Highway Patrolmen don't have balls." There was a moment of silence while she smiled, and he realized what he'd just said. He then closed his book, got back on his motorcycle and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car for several minutes.

This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest asked. "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'" "That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship." "Thank you," said the lady. The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's house. The priest's two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes! Do you want to have some fun?" One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot and screams, "Frank! Put the Bibles away--our prayers have been answered!"

Recently while going through an airport, President Bush encountered a man with long hair, wearing a robe and sandals, holding a staff. President Bush went up to the man and said, "Aren't you Moses?" The man never answered but just kept staring ahead. Again the President said, "Moses!" in a loud voice. The man just kept staring ahead, never answering the president. Soon a secret service agent came along and President Bush grabbed him and said, "Doesn't this man look like Moses to you?" The secret service agent agreed with the President. "Well," said the President, "every time I say his name, he just keeps staring ahead and refuses to speak. Watch!" Again,the President yelled, "Moses!" and again the man stared ahead. The secret service man went up to the man in the robe and whispered, "You look just like Moses. Are you Moses?" The man leaned over and whispered, "Yes, I am Moses, but the last time I talked to a bush I spent 40 years wandering in the desert!"

A prisoner escapes from his prison where he had been kept for 15 years. As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it looking for money and guns but instead he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him up on a chair. While tying the girl up to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up and goes to the bathroom. While he is in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy is an escaped prisoner. He probably spent lots of time in prison, and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, just do what he tells you, give him satisfaction. This guy must be dangerous, if he gets angry, he will kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you", to which the wife responds, "He was not kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay and found you very sexy, and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom." Be strong, honey. I love you too...

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Johnny standing in the foyer of the church, looking at a large plaque that hung there. After the young man of seven had stood there for some time, the pastor walked up beside him and said quietly, "Good morning, son." "Good morning, Pastor," replied the youngster, not taking his eyes off the plaque. "Can I ask you, Sir, what is this for? Why are all these names listed on here?" "Well, son, these are all the people who have died in the service," replied the pastor. Soberly, they stood together, staring up at the large plaque. Little Johnny's voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly, "Which one, Sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30?"

In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Suprised, the man in front turned and snarled, "Just what the hell do you think you are doing?" "Well," said the guy, "you see, I'm a chiropractor and I could see that you were tense, so I had to massage your back. Sometimes I just can't help practicing my art!" "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" the guy replied. "I'm a lawyer. Do you see me screwing the guy in front of me?"

You guys may laugh at this but for me Woody wood pecker I loved that cartoon, the laugh and the tricks :S

Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, Steve Bruce and an old drunk are walking down the street together when simultaneously they each spot a fifty quid note. Who gets it? A: The old drunk, of course - the other 3 are mythical creatures.

Q. Whats the difference between St. Andrews stadium and a cactus? A. On a cactus, the pricks are all on the outside.

Three little boys were concerned because they couldn't get anyone to play with them. They decided it was because they had not been baptized and didn't go to Sunday School. So, they went to the nearest church. Only the janitor was there. One said, "We need to be baptized because no one will come out and play with us. Will you baptize us?" "Sure," said the janitor. He took them into the bathroom and dunked their heads in the toilet bowl, one at a time. Then he said, "Now go out and play." When they got outside, dripping wet, one of them asked, "What religion do you! think we are?" The oldest one said, "We're not Katlick, because they pour the water on you. We're not Babtis because they dunk all of you in it. We're not Methdiss because they just sprinkle you." The littlest one said, "Didn't you smell that water?" "Yeah! What do you think that means?" I think it means that we're "Pisscopalians!"

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather slick looking, well-dressed, just past middle-age gentleman. "Can I help you?" the madam asked. "I want to see Natalie," the old man replied. "Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies, perhaps someone else..." No, I must see Natalie". Just then Natalie appeared and announced to the man that she charges $1000.00 per visit. Without blinking, the man reached into his pocket and handed her ten $100 bills. The two went up to a room for an hour, whereupon the man calmly left. The next night he appeared again demanding to see Natalie. Natalie explained that is was very rare for anyone to come back two nights in a row and that there were no discounts... it was still $1000.00 a visit. Again the man took out the money, the two went up to the room, and an hour later, he left. When he showed up the third consecutive night, no one could believe it. Again he handed Natalie the money and up to the room they went. At the end of the hour Natalie questioned the man: "No one has ever used my services three nights in a row. Where are you from?" The old man replied, "I'm from Philadelphia". "Really?" replied Natalie. "I have family who lives there". "Yes, I know," said the old man. "Your father died and I'm your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000.00 inheritance". MORAL: Some things in life are certain: Death Taxes Being screwed by an attorney

One day, Jimmy Joe was walking down Main Street when he saw his buddy Bubba driving a brand new pickup. Bubba pulled up to him with a wide grin. "Bubba, where'd you get that truck?!?" "Bobby Sue gave it to me" Bubba replied. "She gave it to you? I knew she was kinda sweet on ya, but a new truck?" "Well, Jimmy Joe, let me tell you what happened. We were driving out on County Road 6, in the middle of nowhere. Bobby Sue pulled off the road, put the truck in 4-wheel drive, and headed into the woods. She parked the truck, got out, threw off all her clothes and said, 'Bubba, take whatever you want'. So I took the truck!" "Bubba, you're a smart man!. Them clothes woulda never fit you.

How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to replace a lightbulb? The Answer is TEN: 1. one to deny that a lightbulb needs to be changed, 2. one to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the lightbulb needs to be changed, 3. one to blame Clinton for burning out the lightbulb, 4. one to tell the nations of the world that they are either for changing the lightbulb or for darkness, 5. one to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new lightbulb, 6. one to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner "Lightbulb Change Accomplished", 7. one administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally "in the dark", 8. one to viciously smear #7, 9. one surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along, 10. and finally one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a lightbulb and screwing the country.

Sonny and Bubba were sitting on the porch shooting the breeze. Sonny asked Bubba, "If I snuck ovah to yore house while you wuz out fishin an' made love to your wife, an' she got pregnant, would dat make us kin?" Bubba scratched his head for a bit then said, "I don't think so . . . . but it shore would make us even!"

A new young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript. So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up. In fact, that error would be continued in all subsequent copies. The head abbot replies, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son." So, the head monk goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscript is held in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years. Hours go by, and nobody sees the old abbot. So, the young new monk gets worried and goes downstairs to look for the elder monk. He sees him banging his head against the floor. His forehead is all bloody and bruised, and he is crying uncontrollably. The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong, father?" With a choking voice,the old abbot replies............................ "The word is celebrate."

Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year and every year Morris would say, "Esther, I'd like to ride in that airplane." Esther always replied, "I know Morris, but that airplane ride costs $50, and $50 is $50." One year Morris and Esther went to the fair and Morris said, "Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that airplane I might never get another chance." Esther replied, "Morris, that airplane ride costs is $50, and $50 is $50." The pilot overheard them and said, "Folks, I'll make you a deal. I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you; but if you say one word it's $50." Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word was heard. He did all his tricks over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, "By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't." Morris replied, "Well, I was gonna say something when Esther fell out, but $50 is $50."

A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?" A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four little animals". The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that be sugar?" The little girl said, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed and a jackass to pay for all of it." The teacher fainted.

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better. I have an 18-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?" The doctor considered his question for a minute and then said, "I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season.One day when he was going out in a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his umbrella instead of his gun. When he got to the Creek, he saw a beaver sitting beside the stream. He raised his umbrella and went, 'bang, bang' and the beaver fell dead. What do you think of that?" The 90-year-old said, "I'd say somebody else shot that beaver." "My point exactly," said the Doctor.