ArteSuave

OK so I'm a pretty much a skinny **** with a thin layer of belly fat - kind of like a streaky bacon - and I'd like to bulk and tone a bit. I'm not looking for outrageous results but some visible improvement over the next 6-8 months would be great. I can't be at the gym more than 2-3 times a week and I'm not prepared to give up beer/bread etc because I like them too much. As I say, I'm not looking to smash any records. I've being going to the gym for the last couple of months, I usually do about half an hour on the machines and then swim for half an hour. Is this wasting my time? Do I need to go and look inadequate next to the tattooed monsters lifting 100k on the freeweights in order to progress? Any advice and tips would be welcome here chaps.

Read the links from TheDon on the first page. Starting Strength is a very good program and will give you considerable visible noob gains in 6-8 months. It doesn't require you to eat clean and 3 one hour gym visits a week is plenty. It will definitely require that you conquer your fears of inadequacy in the freeweight section but if you stick to it for six months you'll laugh at the fact you think it takes a monster to lift 100kg.

Rippetoe knows what he's doing (and some of his videos are quite amusing), so I'd recommend you watch the instructionals, read up about the program and if you're feeling really motivated buy the book (it doesn't matter too much which edition but it probably makes sense to go for as new as possible, I have a copy of 2 but 3 is available now).

I **** wish I had found it when I started lifting.

Anyway I would like all forum members opinions on the 100 metres showdown. Is Bolt fit? In yesterdays first heat nothing was given away.

Bolt isn't fully fit and that means anyone from 6 can win it. I reckon Ryan Bailey will end up with a medal. That is unless Bolt's having us on and he runs 9.4.

Oh and I hope Gatlin falls on his face.

Gemili will break 10 seconds and make the final too, I can feel it.*

*Possibly just drunk on GB athletic euphoria.

Sounds like a plan from a shit scifi movie. I'd love it if it worked.

North Korea go 4th (I think) in the medal table with 3 golds.

Kim's just broken the Total WR for the division. Wowzer.

i saw the judo earlier (where the romanian got disqualified) and the commentator said they were surprised how long it took them to get their 1st gold and they hadnt had a good games so far

They haven't had a good showing in the Judo so far. They usually rule everything in the lower weights on the women's side. I don't know how well they usually do at other stuff though.

Wow. I thought I was the red revolutionary around here.

All true enough, but I don't care, I still find it relatively entertaining to watch. Unlike, say, boxing, which I cannot stand.

Fair enough, I love the boxing fwiw. It seems like the most international sport at the games. I'm sure there are plenty of valid arguments against liking it though.

More incredible stuff from another North Korean lifter. Kim just equalled the 62kg division snatch WR (breaking the OR) and he looked like he had plenty more in him.

Dunno why you all hate the equestrianism. I agree the dressage is overly technical and dull, but the cross-country is great.

Three main reasons why I don't like that garbage:

Exclusivity - Horses are expensive as hell. Only a fraction of a percentage of the world's population can even afford to have a go at being an equestrianizer.

Animals in sport - I know if I jumped over fences with someone on my back they wouldn't be getting the credit. Not really a competition between humans IMO. We might as well have elephant wrestling and give a medal to whoever owns the winner. I'm not going to even touch the mental strain training takes on a horse (mainly because I don't know shit about it ).

Physical difficulty - With all due respect if the sexes are competing against each other (not to mention elderly members of both sexes) I struggle to see it as a sport at all. It obviously takes some kind of skill, just not a sporting kind.

By the way Naz v Khan is only ending one way, and that's Khan on the floor, probably in the first round.

:? But he was a featherweight. A tiny featherweight at that.

I agree the ring routines are amazing. I had a go at muscle ups on a pair a few months ago a made a **** wally of myself. I did two proper ones and one shit one and needed a lie down. That inverted cross thing is ridiculous.

Two North Korean golds today. The judo lass had fairly rudimentary skills but was very strong and the kid who won the weightlifting rang a few alarm bells too. First major competition and he hit 3x bodyweight on the C & J!? Massive skull on him to boot.

In fact all of the PRK athlete's I've seen have been absurdly strong...

On a lighter note they both gave credit for their wins to the late Kim Jong Il.

I've got tickets for Judo.

The set up for volleyball scoring is bizarre. All sets to 25 except the decider which is to 15. Why?

I'm very much enjoying the women's volleyball. The shorts are very... aerodynamic.

Why are there sooo many swimming events, and distances?

So they can justify spending a bagillion pounds on an 'aquatics centre' every Olympics is my guess.

Pistols, hand stand push ups, farmer's walk with literally any heavy object you can get your hands on and muscle ups would be my suggestions to go with what dante said.

Blowing bubbles? **** right off.

That's it, I'm turning over.

Some imbecile actually got close enough to knock against me in the squat rack today, in the middle of a work set. Then when I pointed out that he shouldn't do that, he looked shocked that it mattered and said "Alright then, mate". How he's made it past 30 without someone caving his hollow skull in is a mystery.

**** arse hole, I can't wait until I've got enough room for a home gym.

This should probably go it the piss you off thread but I'm here now so this'll do.

Getting Ireland to fulfil his potential would be better than any signing PL could make in this window IMO.

It's the thought that counts :|

Not if the thought ends up being "N O D N O L O T E M O C L E W" instead of "welcome to London" because they couldn't be arsed to double check it.

It can't exactly be hard to find a speaker of Arabic in London, can it?

the usual bobbins about the young players learning from him.

"...And I find it's best to assault them when they're not looking, as that way it's less likely they'll know who's done it.

Also I'd recommend using long words on twitter so that some people confuse your pretentious wankerishness for intelligence and then they'll defend your childish shenanigans".

- Joey Barton

Those shite exposé shows with a clear agenda who slant/cherry pick the facts to fit their predetermined conclusions just as badly as (if not worse than) the people they're attempting to discredit. Really **** gets my goat.

I think 'Panorama' is the word you're looking for

Pretty much, yeah.

Dispatches on C4 does it's best to keep up though among other less notable also rans.

Great thread.

Those shite exposé shows with a clear agenda who slant/cherry pick the facts to fit their predetermined conclusions just as badly as (if not worse than) the people they're attempting to discredit. Really **** gets my goat.

Also the nauseatingly played out radio banter between the presenters and their shitty contrived call in set ups. And the fact that they always seem to work.

Naz would have toyed with Khan like a car with a mouse until he was bored or he fancied knocking him out.

Yeah. Reminds me how much I miss PNH. Was so much fun to watch.

Am I missing something? Hamed was a BW-FW, Khan cuts to make LWW. Khan would hurt him badly inside 2 rounds if they actually fought.

Even comparing their records/performances PFP is difficult as there's not a quarter of the depth of talent at FW and below that there is at LWW-WW.

I agree that Broner looks good but I wouldn't read too much into a fight where he aborted his weight cut. His water cut starts from about 150 apparently so moving up is pretty inevitable.

Dire night of fights. When Matt "Boxercise" Riddle's technique is a highlight you know it sucked.

I was so pumped to see Lombard fight someone good, disappointing doesn't even begin to describe that shite.