lapal_fan

Everyone knows it scientifically impossible to make a lady orgasm..stupid.

:angel:

What a bloke.

Had his delivery of FIFA 11's in late last tuesday night, rang round the interested parties and kept shop open till they got their fix.

Legend.

Is that the shop in Cradley Heath near the KFC?

jesus, used to buy master system games in there! i havent been in for, must be 15 years. looks like ill have start making friends with him as im moving near haden hill 8)

I dont get why people use that smiley to portray sarcasm..

If you cannot think of anything to say (well, it is half 11 I suppose, all that 'el cid' must be taking its toll), then dont say anything at all.

It's just a game of one upmanship that I'm frankly not too bothered about winning. 8) Ciao Bella

s'ok knoppy, I dont want to rob rob's thunder of funniest man on VT.. on reflection im glad it was 101'ed

Cannot believe my thread was locked!

Ahh cheers for sorting that.

Shame you didnt shine in your management role, but its better to be happy with your job/life than purely financial happiness.

This isn't a dig mooneyboy, but what exactly is the masters part of managing I.T?

I don't understand why you'd need a mastership to run a computer - although I am aware that it must be harder than checking to see how much room you have on your harddrive

same with me and mine. 7 years in April - time flies.

trololol

hi 5 '/b/rothers'!

4chan is random.

Sometimes its really funny, other times its really illegal. Its both the best and worse of the internet, in one place.

I love and hate it.

no matter what though its NSFW!

I just watch a video of a Mexican man being decapitated by terrorists.

I dont know why I did, now I feel sick and for some reason, breathing hurts.

I cant sleep and I need to be up early in the morning (*just as day is dawning..*)

I hate 4chan. :cry:

1 point/ 0 points, who cares?

New manager starts next game, let's do it 8)

I saw two dead bodies on the M6 South today, about 8 miles away from Keele Services..

was very surreal. Stay safe everyone x

wow.

honestly, i have googled a few things but alas, cannot find anything that doesnt require a download. Unfortunately I cannot download anything as I am on a company laptop*

*pile of shit, they think is a laptop

I need a photo posterised!

Yet I do not own the necessary software to do so.

Could I forward to said photo to someone who could basically posterise it and send it back to me?

Its for a top secret mission!

Do you ever get bored?

I was made redundant last year in August from a EPC Assessor job - which I absolutely loved, got mega bored after a month and just worked in a jewellery factory to get a bit of pocket money for xmas and get myself out of the house. On the last week of my xmas factory job I got a call for an interview in Manchester for another EPC Assessor job which I obviously took, got the job and I now work from home, travel the country to different commercial buildings, survey them and drive home to model them on a computer and give out reports to the clients, advising them what they can do to make their building more energy efficient.

But for that month/2 months, I was so bored..I had to get myself doing any job I could my hands on - thus I worked in a factory for a few months which I found very interesting, making jewellery they sell in Argos and Index online. Great experience with very friendly people.

Can we please try and get the papers to name Graham Souness as a candidate?

I would donate 5 english pounds if a paper mentions his name because of this site

I cant believe there isnt a manager at an Italian, Spanish, German club who had been at their club for 2 years who could see Villa in the premier league and thing 'id like a crack at that'.

Every suggestion except Martin Jol is shit.

Even an International manager who would want to do both jobs would be good.

I'm sad :cry:

I wish MON was still in charge

Brumerican wrote:

Derren Brown would be my favoured choice. Just imagine the mind games with Fergie and Wenger!!!

And a return to the days of the communal baths in the changing rooms!

sorry my cry laugh man was for the chindie page. I like that kind of music, but its very true

FC Köln

Following this, he managed his former club 1. FC Köln, also in the 2. Fußball-Bundesliga, but was unable to get the club promoted and so left. In 2000, he applied for the manager job at Scottish club Dundee FC but the Dundee chairman rejected his application.

Xerez CD

In 2001 he received an offer from the small club Xerez CD in Southern Spain and he managed the team, very successfully, for two seasons; the second and third best seasons in the history of the club. However, he could not promote the team to Primera Division.

Shakhtar Donetsk

In 2003, he accepted a deal to coach the Ukrainian side Shakhtar Donetsk where he established a club record number of consecutive victories. However, the team did not win the championship and did not reach the final round of the Champions League with a match against Lokomotiv Moscow. Schuster was fired one week before his team played and won the Ukrainian Cup in 2004.

Levante

He went back to Spain in summer 2004 to coach Levante UD and made a good start with the small club from Valencia. The president fired him with a 5-point advantage over the relegation places just five games from the end of the season. Levante could not win a game and fell to Segunda División (Spanish second division) again.

Getafe

In summer 2005, Getafe CF, a small side from Madrid, had their best season in team history under his guidance. Schuster coached Getafe in their second successful season and the team did even better, 7th in La Liga. Getafe have also secured entry to the 2007-08 UEFA Cup as a result of reaching the final of the Copa del Rey after overcoming a 5-2 first leg defeat against Barcelona, beating them 4-0 in the second leg.

Real Madrid

Real Madrid players celebrating their win in the Spanish Supercopa in the 2007-2008 seasonSchuster was then appointed manager of Real Madrid on 9 July 2007.[3] He was required to buy-out his existing contract with Getafe for €480,000, which he paid for out of his own pocket. He made a successful start with Real taking them to top of the La Liga standings. As manager beautiful football returned again to the Santiago Bernabeu stadium with Real Madrid having the strongest offence, not beaten at home from the start of the league and defeating their arch rival Barcelona at their home ground Camp Nou with a goal scored by Julio Baptista thus increasing their lead to seven points between them and the second place (Barcelona). The team also qualified to the second round of the UEFA Champions League leading their group which also contained Olympiacos, Werder Bremen and S.S. Lazio. He improved Real Madrid's style of play significantly. He managed to switch from the unattractive defensive football during the reign of Fabio Capello to fast paced, attacking football. After losing 2-1 to AS Roma in the second leg of the UEFA Champions League which meant the elimination of Real Madrid, many doubted that Schuster would continue to be Madrid's coach, but the club denied such allegations.

On 4 May 2008, Schuster guided Real Madrid to their 31st title with 3 games to spare.[4] On 18 May 2008, Schuster's Real Madrid achieved the highest point total (85 points) a record that was set by rivals Barcelona. He then went on to win the 2008 Spanish Super Cup.[5]

On 9 December 2008 Schuster stepped down [6] as manager after a 4-3 defeat to Sevilla FC, and speaking out publicly about his team standing no chance of beating Barcelona in the El Clásico derby match.[7] He was replaced by Juande Ramos, former Sevilla FC and Tottenham Hotspur coach.

Xerez

On 5 December 2009 he announced he will buy his former club Xerez[8] and the former Real Madrid coach is interested to managing Xerez starting from January and has already contacted the club's chairman Joaquin Morales.[9] The German coach previously worked at Xerez CD from 2001 to 2003.[8]

Beşiktaş

On 10 June 2010, Turkish club Beşiktaş announced that Schuster had agreed to become the club's new manager on a two-year contract.[10] Among his first signings for the club were Portuguese winger Ricardo Quaresma and former Real midfielder Guti, who was coached by Schuster at Madrid.

I want him..stupid Beskitas :cry:

In July 1998, Houllier was invited to become joint team manager of Liverpool Football Club, together with Roy Evans. The arrangement did not work out and Roy Evans resigned in November after losing to Tottenham Hotspur 3-1 at home in the League Cup prior to that defeat Liverpool were knocked out of the UEFA Cup by Spanish side Celta Vigo, leaving Houllier in sole charge of the team.

Houllier began what he described as a five-year program to rebuild the team, starting in 1999. That summer, Paul Ince, David James, Jason McAteer, Rob Jones, Tony Warner and Steve Harkness were all sold, while Steve McManaman left on a free. At the same time eight new players, Sami Hyypiä, Dietmar Hamann, Stéphane Henchoz, Vladimír Šmicer, Sander Westerveld, Titi Camara, Eric Meijer and Djimi Traoré were all signed. Also, Liverpool's training facilities at Melwood were thoroughly overhauled.

The rebuilding continued in 2000, with the signings of Markus Babbel, Nicky Barmby, Pegguy Arphexad, Grégory Vignal, Emile Heskey, Gary McAllister, Igor Bišćan and Christian Ziege, as well as the departures of David Thompson, Phil Babb, Dominic Matteo, Steve Staunton, Brad Friedel and Stig Inge Bjørnebye

The efforts yielded a result in the successful 2000–01 season, when Liverpool won a cup treble of the League Cup, the FA Cup and the UEFA Cup and finished third in the English Premier League. Liverpool went on to win the FA Community Shield against Manchester United and UEFA Super Cup against Bayern Munich.

In October 2001, after falling ill at half time in the Liverpool's Premier League match with Leeds United, Houllier was rushed to hospital for an emergency operation when he suffered a dissected aorta. With the help of caretaker manager Phil Thompsonhe guided Liverpool to the second-place finish in the league, their best record in the Premiership. Houllier returned to active management of the club after five months. An example of his infallibility came when Houllier substituted the defensive midfielder Dietmar Hamann with winger Vladimír Šmicer in an away match against Bayer Leverkusen in the UEFA Champions League quarter-final. The scoreline was 1-1 with Bayer needing two goals to win. With a gap in the defense, however, Liverpool was exposed to endless attacks, and Liverpool failed to advance to the semi-final.[2]

In the 2002-2003 Liverpool finished in the fifth place in the Premiership, failing to qualify for the Champions League next season. Critics blamed Houllier's unsuccessful summer signings in 2002, namely El Hadji Diouf (Lens, £10 million), Salif Diao (Sedan, £5 million) and Bruno Cheyrou (Lille, £4 million), and his failure to make Nicolas Anelka's loan move permanent in favour of signing the ineffective Diouf. Houllier's failure to replace creative talents such as Gary McAllister and Jari Litmanen was also criticized.[3][4]

A lack of success in the following seasons when Liverpool struggled to qualify for the Champions League despite substantial investment in players, with what was perceived as negative one-dimensional tactics and unattractive football, a poor youth policy, his constant mention of "turning corners" [5] and a lack of support from fans [6] led to Houllier's departure from Liverpool on 24 May 2004. During a press conference leading up to his departure Houllier said, 'If they want to go back to the '70s & '80s they can do that but not with me' shortly after Houllier left the press conference.

After reading that, im not extremely impressed.. plus he's 62 and is coming into the last 4 year contract he will inevitably be given. I'm not saying he would be terrible, just not what I think Villa should be looking for.