EastEndVillan

Two lazy strikers (bent and berbatov) = NO GOALS

Didn't Bent and Berbatov play together at spuds, how'd that work out?

I have, since the Vlaar signing, read hundreds of pages of comments of conjecture and supposition about the Villa, Lambert, Learner and the direction the club may or may not be heading. What bemused me the most is how people can so vigouriously argue a point or position based on so little fact. There can be any number of reasons why there's been the level of activity that there has been. This could range from:

1) Randy's lost interest, and won't spend any money.

2) there's a sell to buy policy, so we can't bring anyone in until we shift the likes of Hutton/Warnock

3) Lambert has found that his targets are not available so is keeping his powder dry

4) deals have been put in place, and will be completed when the selling club have a replacement

And so on

My point is that no one, certainly not on VT, knows what the actually situation is, and therefore people should be keeping an open mind as any scenario is as likely as any other.

I'm a great believe in momentum in football, and since thet sacking of TSM and the appointment of PL the Villa have been gaining some forward momentum, but all this negativity about transfers, is only doing one thing, eroding that momentum.

I'm sure some people will say 'i'm entitled to my opinion', and you are. Nobody is trying to deny you this right, but in the absence of any concrete evidence or facts, the opposite view point of yours is equally as likely.

I'm not against it per se, but do we currently have the players in center midfield that could accommodate playing both Bent and Carroll? This could obviously change if there's changes in personnel over the next couple of weeks.

The other thought, which nobody other than PL and RL will know, is what percentage of the transfer funds available would be used up if we were to spend £15m+ on Carroll. If it's all or most, think the money would be best used else where, like a left back. If there's still money available for other positions, why not, crack on - notwithstanding the first point.

Where does one start!

Firstly I would deliberately make the population temporarily infertile, presume some sort of chemical/hormone applied to the water system. Any prospective parents would then have to apply to the licensing authority, me, to have a have a temporary antibody, to enable them to procreate. Conditions for procreation would be able based on the financial/emotional/intelligence of the prospective applicants. This should prevent the Jeremy Kyle audience/participants from endlessly breading and leaving the state to pick up the pieces/cost.

Secondly, all equipment in gyms to have some sort of dynamo fitted to them, which when the machines are used creates electricity which can be pumped back into nation grid. So much wasted energy there.

All new buildings must be built with Solar panels, why would you not, just make it a default planning condition.

All inconsiderate drivers should be blown up by guided missiles when driving badly, this includes my neighbour who can't park for sh1te, who manage to take up the space for 3 cars when she parks. Haven't quite worked out the delivery mechanism on this one yet, or how all drivers can be monitored simultaneously.

6 plus 3 different houses whilst at Uni, but don't consider them a home.

So:

Streetly - Parents

Uni - Sheffield

Back to Streetly - Parents

Holloway - With the Doris

Wood Green - with the Doris

Enfield - With the Doris

Walthamstow - With Doris

Walthamstow - with different Doris.

Yeah there was a tweet from the official BCFC twitter account stating that the embargo had been lifted - Can I just point out that I don't follow BCFC, just was re-tweeted by someone I do follow.

Hate to break it to every one, but in the UK, paper is for the 2nd anniversary, I believe that it's cotton for the 1st. I think it's the other way round in the states.

If Small Heath are turning down 6 million pound bids then maybe their finances are not as bad as we think. It just seems strange that they'd sell Mutch for 2.5 million but reject 6 million for Butland who has never even played for them. This tells me that either A) they are not as f*cked as we think, Southampton offered to pay it in installments and Small Heath want cash up front, or C) They are relying on Southampton's offer sparking a bidding war to get a million or two more. It's a weird one!

or (D) There was no bid from Southampton, the Blues release some guff about rejecting a bid (which never existed) and they look to the outside world and more importantly to their fans that they they are not in the financial sh1te as had been previously suggested.

how the f*ck has the olympic logo on tower bridge cost £1m?

Cost just over £300 grand but still a lot! The money came from the

, which will be used to back free cultural events across London. London f*ckin London!! I dont give a sh*t about the olympics, plus it mainly London who benefit. Will the people of Birmingham get any of this Look and Celebration budget? No! :evil:

Meh! Birmingham is a sh*t hole of no relevance anyway.

If you want to benefit from all the cool stuff that goes on in the country then move to London.

This ^^^

comedians that I like:

Mark Thomas

Lee Nelson

Russell Howrd

Dara O'Brien

Eddie Izzard

Reg D. Hunter

Bill Bailey

Rich Hall

Dylan Morgan

Frankie Boyle

Frank Skinner

Ones that I can tolerate, but wouldn't watch:

Stuart Lee - its just too slow.

Sean Locke

Michael McIntyre

+ many others

Can't Stand

Jim Davidson / chubby brown

Lee Evans - can believe he's still going - it he still going that pumping himself up 'joke'

jo brand

lucy porter

Tim vine

Lee mack

Andy Parsons

Ricky Gervais

We are currently having our processes LEAN'd. So they have employed another team to come in and help make us more efficient.

We've just been Lean'd, even though we're an IT department. Never have I seen such a load of old ar$e gravy in all my life. Have you done your VVS's yet. I find it odd how a supposedly 21st century IT department is re-defining its processes using different colour post notes and and brown parcel paper.

PRINCE and SSADM, anyone?

PRINCE as in PRojects IN a Controlled Environment - the de facto Project Management standard - Well versed and qualified in that bullsh1te. SSADM is a new one on me!

We are currently having our processes LEAN'd. So they have employed another team to come in and help make us more efficient.

We've just been Lean'd, even though we're an IT department. Never have I seen such a load of old ar$e gravy in all my life. Have you done your VVS's yet. I find it odd how a supposedly 21st century IT department is re-defining its processes using different colour post notes and and brown parcel paper.

Marketing and/or Human Resources. Does there exist a business function more densely populated by utter f*ckwits than these two?

Gareth, let me introduce to Procurement (Public Sector), they take things to a new level. It's not about getting value for money, i.e. the cheapest, but about being compliant with rules and regs, even if it cost you twice as much!!

Word wedi ei bod Martin Laursen wedi rhoi'r gorau i'w swydd a bydd yn mynd i Abertawe

Saw this from a welsh journo on twitter...anyone fancy a crack at trying to translate??

Aberwate is the Welsh name for Swansea, but that's the limit of my Welsh.

Only seen the 2nd half, it's been a really entertaining end to end game, and what a good goal by the Polish fella.

I don't rate Wellbeck but I thought he did well yesterday - always seemed to make the ball stick when it was played to him, didn't waste many passes and put himself about well.

Thought we did well defensively, although this meant Gerrard played far far too deep to be effective going forward.

Am I the only one who worries about Johnson defensively? Still can't understand Richards being overlooked for this role.

This^

The problem with playing Johnson is that you need to play Milner ahead of him to give the extra protection. If you'd taken Richards, for instance, the midfielder ahead of him wouldn't need to be so defensive minded, so you could play Walcott or Oxlade-C (for instance) who provide more of an attacking threat.

Additionally, you could play Milner next to Parker in the centre, and play Gerrard as the support striker, meaning he can influence the game higher up the pitch.

f this is the first contact made to lambert or norwich then lerner and faulkner are absolute fools, this should have been done the day mcleish was fired! lets hope lambert says yes and isnt put off by not being approached sooner

Agree.

Maybe we're doing them a disservice, and they've put the spadework in in a very diligent and hush hush manner over the past few weeks.

But if one club could make a complete pigs ear of this, it's us!

Perhaps we did make contact shortly after sacking TSM! And perhaps he (PL) said come back at the end of the month, there's a few loose ends to tie up so I don't leave NCFC in sh1te when I leave. We just don't know, and critising the club is a little disingenuous.

Moyes is going to Spurs.

This is a rumour but that is also saying that Levy will ask Harry to move on.

Kenwright is also no mug and if Moyes won't sign a new contract and he hangs onto him, then he walks when his present contract runs out -

he gets nothing.

Whereas if he let's him go this summer - he'll get a fair amount of compensation.

Would Everton Football Club need said compensation?

Why would Levy/Spurs want rid of 'Arry?

what makes us think that if it is true and Martinez is out of the LFC running that we are going to get him now...?

It depends why he has pulled out.

He may not have recieved certain assurances that he would get with us.

Thats extremely optimistic. 'Assurances' i know liverpool is not ideal but were nowhere near either... Sacking Mcleish after that long after houllier fell ill. Then No money available and older (past-it) players with younger players that think of the cars and money more than the club. If i wernt a villain i know who i'd choose out of villa and pool.

It could be the incompatibility to work with DoF. Seem to recall reading that Martinez would/did want total control, such as the style of football and training of the U14 teams. Perhaps, Liverplop couldn't offer that assurance, as it would have been treading on the toes of the DoF; and thus Martinez turning it down

Haven't these people heard of the telephone or even better video conferencing? If both parties wanted an informal chat, surely it'd be better to do this under the prying eyes of the media/thetrees!

More to it than a informal chat out of politeness.

I’ve got to say, that it’s not an envious task the board now have. I think we look back at the previous two managers and what they were trying to do. Under MO’N we played exciting counter attacking football, lots of chance and lots of goals. I personally, think that under that style of football, we we’re only ever going to be the best of the rest, and never were going to break through the glass ceiling into the champion league places. Let’s not forget that this would have required £20m a season just to stand still.

I believe that GED recognised this that the style of football was only going to get us so far, and sought to change it to a more composed passing/retention of the ball style. One of GEDs biggest problems was that he tried to change too much and too quickly, and the players that he largely inherited were not cut out for that style of play (that’s you Messrs Dunne & Collins).

So here we are again, and I believe the club have an opportunity define the future style of play with the appointment of the next manager. First of all lets rule out the likes of Bruce; McCarthy; Kean, Megson, Hoddle and Curblishly, for either poor previous performances, being out of the game for too long, or for simply being Steve Bruce.

I think that we can also rule out the like of Benny (FWS), too old, and would require serious amounts of cash.

So, which style of football do the board want for AVFC? If it’s the MO’N brand, then the obvious choice would be Paul Lambert. One would hope that his experience of German Football, differentiates him substantially enough away from MO’N, and he could, eventually break through the glass ceiling (over time). One advantage of this appointment would be that the current squad would be more at home with this style of play, thus leading to less upheaval and hopefully a quicker turn around in play, points and achievements.

Alternatively, if the club seeks to change the football style to more (dare I say continental) style, then the obvious candidates would be either Martinez or Rodgers. Both would appear to have adopted this style of football at their existing clubs, to a greater or less extent. Perhaps the draw back to this approach is that it would clearly take longer to implement, more changes to playing personnel. Have we, the fans or the board, got the patience to wait for these changes to take affect, I don’t know.

My one big fear about the like Lambert, Rogers and McDermott, is this a season too early for them - there’s always the fear of 1st season wonders, eg Owen Coyle, who was flavour of the month last season, only to relegate Bolton this year.

The other remaining candidates, which fit somewhere in the middle would be DiCanio - no for me, largely due his fascist tendencies. DiMatteo - Has done well with Chelsea, but you get the feeling that he’s little more than a figurehead, for Drogba Lampard and Terry, who are really running that team.

I suppose that AVB would be an interesting choice, good age, something to prove, the opportunity to shape the team in his own vision, but does he come with too much baggage from his Chelsea time, and would he be off like a shot at the 1st opportunity to manage a CL team? Would he even come to AVFC?

Chris Hughton, did a good job with both Newcastle and the Blues, and certainly would merit an opportunity at a better club than BCFC. My one nagging doubt about him isn’t so much about his abilities, but where he’s come from. I know we’ve spent all season trying to convince anybody that would listen about “the Scottish Manager” that it wasn’t where he cam from, but his football ability and/or style, I just still feel that there are supporters that would never accept a Blues man, and this juncture in the clubs history unity is key, and just feel Hughton would be too divisive.

Are there any other candidates out there? I will profess not to have the extensive European and world football knowledge that some on VT clearly have, a thus may have not included some obvious targets - Solskjaer, Bielsa.

Who would I want? I don’t know. I’m not privy to some of the inner most workings of AVFC, nor the strategies and goals for Randy, so don’t have sufficient information to make a decision. I think any of Lambert, Martinez, AVB or Rodgers would be a good choice. The important things is, who ever gets the job, is that AVFC move forwards, together.

The reason i included both holt and ruddy is the message that it would send out, ie if you show good form and are doing well, you deserve to be recognised. For too long the England team has been based on reputations and not form, that sends out the wrong message.

I'd have Carroll over Crouch purely due to age, Carroll is 23, and would be around for 10 years, this is probably crouch's last tournament.

Scott Sinclair is a good shout, might have him over Walcott.

With Roy Hodgson set to name his 23 man squad for Euro 2012 on 16th May, I thought I'd create a VT England Euro 2012 thread.

So, post the squad that you'd take, not the squad that you think Hodgson will take.

Here's mine:

GK: Joe Hart

GK: John Ruddy

GK: Rob Green

DF: Kyle Walker

DF: Micah Richards

DF: Ashley Cole

DF: Leighton Baines

DF: Joleon Lescott

DF: John Terry

DF: Gary Cahill

DF: Phil Jones

MD: Scott Parker

MD: Steven Gerrard

MD: Gareth Barry

MD: Ashley Young

MD: James Milner

MD: Alex Oxlade-Chamberlin

MD: Theo Walcott

FW: Wayne Rooney

FW: Darren Bent

FW: Daniel Sturridge

FW: Andy Carroll

FW: Grant Holt

Tin hat on........

so is anyone doing the banner :-

"Its not where your from - its where youre taking us '

to good to miss ?

Love this, but if it does happen, can we ensure that it's grammatically correct, i.e. apostrophes in "it's" and "you're", and you're instead of "your"

Don't want to re-enforce stereotypical image of the stupid Brummie.

There would be one tangible positive in replacing AM with KMac or GC, which would blow away the fug of despair and desperation that currently lingering over B6. The uplift in morale of the fans, from AM going, would be palpable, and would filter through to the players on the pitch. This might give us the much needed short term boost to get us over the 40 point finishing line.

A search for a permanent replacement can be begin after the Norwich game.