Sit_Down_Potato_Head

What's blue, hangs from the ceiling and doesn't fit anymore ?

Ian Curtis.

Dear General,

Will you be around for the Man City game on Saturday?

If so, how about popping over to the Lower Doug Ellis for that pint I owe you?

Tyson's backing Hatton !

Former world heavyweight champion Mike Tyson is backing Ricky Hatton in his fight against Floyd Mayweather in Las Vegas, saying a victory for the The Hitman would be "good for the sport".

Tyson was the youngest man to win a world heavyweight belt but later became better known for a series of controversial incidents both in and out of the ring, serving three years in jail after being convicted of rape and also memorably biting off a portion of Evander Holyfield's ear during his comeback.

While some believe Tyson's behaviour has been bad for boxing he has thrown his weight behind Hatton in the most hotly-anticipated bout of the year because of the Englishman's ability to improve the standing of the sport.

He told the Daily Mirror: "I want Hatton to win. I like his style, I like his attitude.

"I'm not the same with Mayweather. I don't like the flash stuff. I don't like the way he acts with money and the arrogance.

The conveyer belt of comedy just keeps cranking on at Sty Andrews. Fresh from the attempt to land Lippi (who I don't actually think speaks English) comes the news Blues and Bruce are locked in a battle over money.

And the source of the dispute? Image rights! Yes you read that correct image rights, yes Steve Bruce and image rights!

At first I assumed that Bruce perhaps paid Blues to not put his picture on stuff or even paid them to make him look less repulsive with the aid of photoshop and that he wanted a refund as he was leaving.

But stageringly they pay him image rights which begs the question what do they use his image for Beauty and the Beast Disney **** lunch boxes? The only other thing I could think of was perhaps Hallowen masks.

Either that or they have started selling dolls with his face on in Anne Summers - the mind boggles.....

Steve Bruce and image rights I never thought I'd hear anything as funny in my life

I have to say after the shite of the last couple of days this rant has put a amile back on my face!

Top work!

Perhaps he owes the scum £225,000 because he took his "John Merrick" mask off:

Messrs Sullivan and Gold walk into a pub, and Marcello Lippi is at the bar...............

It has to be Capello or Mourinho.

Barwick nearly creamed himself over wooing Scolari last year, and to have Capello and Mourinho out of a job at the moment is an absolute gift.

Out of the British crop, only MON has the credentials, but he's staying put.

And in today's Mirror, keeping with the tradition of seeking out the best managers in the world, Werewolf is reported to want to buy-out Egg-Foo Yeung and install that renowned international tactical genius ERIC BLACK as manager.

My sides have split, and my cock's fallen off with laughing soo much !!!

What no Barry Fry or Ron Jeremy??

Put them in the poll at once !

when i first saw the program in the TV guide I'd had a few and thought it was called "did Boy George really kill Jill Jill Dando "

Why did he have to clean up NYC's litter for shooting Jill Dando ?

I'm confused.

Hi General,

Out of curiosity what is the current situation between yourself and the BCFC board? did it all get sorted, or was it a case of letting sleeping dogs lie?

Or "pigs" perhaps ? :winkold:

Well done Nibbler.....AND you remembered the score this time !

Joe Cole,

Has a big fat head

Joe Cole

Has a big fat head

Dear General,

I tried to book my ticket for the Leicester game on line yesterday. As a season ticket holder it's £15 (demonstrating to our grubby neighbours what value for money is really all about !), but there's no option for season ticket holders to purchase a ticket at this price on line.

I also had to register on the website to get this far and ended up with a different client number to my existing one.

Apologies if this has been covered before (I seem to remember you saying that they were looking at the website some time ago), but it'd save everyone a bit of time if, when registering for tickets, you had the option to put in your season ticket/client number details.

Cracking cartoon in the Mail yesterday, by the way.

As they say in the Black Country:

"Tay brawke, day fix it "

No.

I'd just speed up and turn the wipers on !!

Pip-pip !!

I wonder who the first pillock to put "Jedi" will be ?

If we don't sign a keeper, we've a good one and a decent one and can still function in the top half.

If we don't sign a centre half, we've three good ones and are still capable of finishing in the top half.

If we don't sign a central midfielder, and we're lucky with injuries and Barry doesn't have to play left back, we'll be okay.

If we don't sign a second powerful striker, we'll need to be lucky with injuries to Carew, or we'll struggle. (Although Luke is now a big lad.)

If we don't sign a back up left back, we'll need to be lucky with injuries, or we'll have to move Barry from midfield.

If we don't sign a right back, we'll have Mellberg and Gardner as our only options and we'll be ****.

So for me, that's one signing we absolutely need, a new right back just to stay where we are.

To improve, we need that right back and a back up right back, a back up left back, a left sided midfielder or a central midfielder, (depending on where we leave Barry), a centre half and a big striker.

Or, we'll need to be really really lucky.

I don't think you can leave all that until August. I'd be surprised if we don't have at least half of this in place by the time we cross the pond.

Bloody Hell - you sound like Doug Ellis !!!

Giuly would be a dream signing IMO. For that price, well, what's better than a bargain? Anyway, sign him uo quickly, mr MON. He's class. Didn't think Barca would sell him.

...and certainly not for £1.5M !

Oi spud face, that macro was not shot on Auto Focus you bloody celluloid dinosaur

Grrr. And another thing, getting B&W film developed these days is a real headache - I can tell you.

Bloody fancy autofocus, digital, photoshoppy heathens !!

When this gets to 1,000 pages, I want £5 off everone. OK?!!

I have just read in the Evening Mail that Luke is linked to Boro. No links yet but should appear in ibirmingham later today

It's only a vain attempt to prevent him scoring ANOTHER HAT-TRICK against them next season !

Ha, ha - Middlesborough are our Biiiiiiyaaaatchhhhhh-aaaaah !

Kewell's shite.

Next.

I think he's almost certain to sign a DM to replace McCann. As far as I see it, his biggest priorities are a new DM, a new striker, and a new GK.

You forgot a new RB.

Which logoically has to be his number one priority as at the moment we have the inept defensively Aaron Hughes and the perma-crocked Mark De La Knee

Kromkamp, Kromkamp !!

Nice article Nibbler.

But the word "clearing in the woods" would've sufficed !!