Craigyh74

Made level 15 last night only another 45 to go. What level do you need to be before you can get a mount?

what are everyone elses names so i can add them to the list

the name is Tarq. i'm posttering about the Tauren settlement at the mo doing quests. I've got to deliver a head some where but i forgot where the place is doh

What a feckin great game Just had a couple of hours on it, lvl 6 Tauren Druid. You lot were right about how addictive the game is.

Any idea's of the best character class to go for?

I've given into temptation and started to install it (god it taking for ever)

Is it Deathwing you lot are on? I'm thinking about being one of those Minotaur looking things. Any tips?

Is that a hint that if i was allowed to join the group it would be good to be a druid :winkold:

Bought it yesterday but I'm trying to resist the temptation of installing it untill after my exams next week. I have a couple of questions , what is the best server to join and any tips on the best type of charaters?

Cheers

How To Shower Like a Woman:

Take off clothes and place them in sectioned laundry basket according to

lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do

more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and

pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added

vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tile cleaner.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

>>How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a

pile. Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo'

sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair.

Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Wee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath

the whole time.

Admire willy size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the 'woo-woo'

sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

31 in December. Day of the MUsa game so i'll be on the ale early

A man has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His camel

dies of thirst. He's crawling through the sands, certain that he has

breathed his last, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out

the sand, several yards ahead of him.

He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what

looks to be an old brief case.

He opens it and out pops a genie but this is no ordinary genie. He is

wearing a Senior Managers ID badge and a dull grey suit.

"Well" says the genie. "You know how it works. You have three wishes."

"I'm not falling for this" says the man. "I'm not going to trust a

Senior Manager."

"What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks

like you're a goner anyway!" The man thinks about this decides that the

genie is right.

"OK I wish I were in a lush oasis with plentiful food and drink

"***POOF** The man finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever

seen. And he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of

delicacies. "

OK kid, what's your second wish"

"My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams"

***POOF*** The man finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled

with rare gold coins and precious gems. "OK kid you have just one more

wish. Better make it a good one!"

After thinking for a few minutes, the man says. "I wish that no matter

where I go beautiful women will want me and Need me"

**POOF*** He is turned into a Tampon.

The moral of the story? If a Senior Manager offers you anything,

there's going to be a string attached.

not met anyone...but then again I could have walked passed any of you down at a match or in the Holte Suite

Maybe he's bulking the team out with squad players before he suprises us with the major signings....(highly unlikely though)

At the end of the tax year the Tax Office sent an inspector to Audit the books of a Synagogue. While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said, "I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?"

"Good question," noted the Rabbi. "We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles."

"Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way:

"What about all these bread -wafer purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?"

"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi, realising that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We collect them and send them back to the manufactures, and every now and then they send us a free box of bread - wafers."

"I see," replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know - it - all Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"

"Here, too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save all the foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete dick."

Paddy's doing well on "Who wants to be a Millionaire"

He's got #500,000. Chris Tarrant asks him the big question for 1

million quid. "Paddy, for #1million, who was the great train robber?

Was it,

A, Ronnie Barker...

B, Ronnie O'Sullivan...

C, Ronnie Corbett or..was it

D, Ronnie Biggs???"

Paddy say's..."Oi'll take de money please Chris"

Chris reminds him that he still has his 3 life lines left.

Paddy again say's.."Nope, Oi'll take de money please Chris"

"You don't want to phone a friend?" says Chris.

"No t'anks, Oi'll take de money - foinal answer"

"OK" says Chris, looking bemused "give him a round of applause ladies

and gentlemen, Paddy goes away with =#500,000. However before you

go,you'll obviously want to know what the answer was Paddy?"

Paddy said "No, yer alroight, Oi knew de answer anyway, t'anks Chris"

"You knew it anyway!....are you mad!!!" asks Chris, "Are you mental?"

Paddy says, "Oi moight be mental Chris....but Oi'm no feckin grass!".

The one bastard thing is that using modded Xboxes on Xbox live is a right bastard.

One of my fave things about the Xbox is the online element.

I thought you can disable most mod chips so you can still use xbox live

Get yourself a Vectrex from gamestation. They're about £140-180 sepending on condition.

Then tell me "Minestorm" isn't the best version of Asteroids ever.

I found one of those thing's in the In-laws loft, took it to game station who gladly gave me £70 for it and £7 per game

A man went into a Clock repair shop, unzipped his fly and flopped his penis onto the counter.

The woman assistant is shocked "I'm sorry sir, this is a Clock repair shop, not a Cock repair shop"

he says "yeah, I know, but I want a face and two hands put on it"

*************************************************************

3 kids got really low grades in their sex education test, they were discussing ways to get 'back' at their teacher.

First Kid (who got a D+)"I'm gonna grab her and throw her on the ground"

2nd Kid (who got a D-) "Yeah, then I'm gonna rip her panties off"

3rd Kid (who got a F) "Yeah good idea, then I'll kick her in the balls!!"

*************************************************************

Q. What did Snow White say to Pinnochio while sitting on his face?

A. "Lie Pinnochio, lie!"