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Things that piss you off that shouldn't


AVFCforever1991

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When it comes to sports, I've always been a consistent all-rounder, shit at everything.

Lol, same.

You do seem to be pretty good at running though, Mike, no?

Middle of the pack - probably better than the average man in the street (certainly of my age). But it requires no real skill.

He beat me in the 1982 London Marathon, the bastard.

I Jest

I could'nt run a marathon, im a good runner when it comes to sport but just running, not my bag!

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On the subject of being a 'keeper in a Sunday League side, I found the most annoying part was teammates expecting you to come out and pluck crosses out of the air like confetti. There are International goalies who struggle to catch crosses yet I was expected to deal single-handedly with all of the opposition's corners!

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I used to be a fairly decent runner and i'd agree with those that say Mike is being modest , there is def a skill to it

I liked my football and other team games but you have an off day and you can be carried

when i used to line up at the start line on the track , if i hadn't put the graft in on the training ground there was nowhere to hide

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OK, I know what you mean, but running is inherent aptitude plus training plus mental determination. That's it. Ball games require all those things PLUS brain-eye-hand/foot co-ordination, balance, teamwork, etc. And I was always spectacularly bad at ball games. Which was disappointing, as I like them. I bluffed my way in football by using my stamina and speed to run up and down the line while others tired. And I could JUST about get a cross in occasionally. But that was it.

Oh well.

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OK, I know what you mean, but running is inherent aptitude plus training plus mental determination. That's it. Ball games require all those things PLUS brain-eye-hand/foot co-ordination, balance, teamwork, etc. And I was always spectacularly bad at ball games. Which was disappointing, as I like them. I bluffed my way in football by using my stamina and speed to run up and down the line while others tired. And I could JUST about get a cross in occasionally. But that was it.

Oh well.

yes, very similar ere too

it turned out in school that any distance less than 800m made me look like a very bad case of sportaspaz, once it went 800m and over I could just do this switch off and metronome sort of thing. Just keep going at a modest enoug pace.

I didn't like running, it was boring. But I transfered what tiny ability I had into football. Generally I'd hide during the first half, then huff and puff around all through the second half whilst those who thought they were on MOTD were generally knackered by about the 70th minute. Their decline against my starting 45 minutes late got me blagged through a few seasons.

Then, in my late 20's I found I lost the second phase of my tactics, and was basically told to **** off by all my mates.

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Being crap at sports.

I'm fairly fit and all right at most sports, and if I play them a lot I tend to improve to a level known amongst friends as "decent".

Can't get squash at all. Played a lad who isn't fit but has played squash for years for the last few weeks and he beat me six games in a row, in two games I scored 0. He was pitying me the last time we played offering to replay points, no bugger off, I'll take the 0 thank you.

Playing again next week and I'm determined to beat him in a match.

Racket sports can be like that.

I've recently taken up table tennis at work, at lunch times. Play with two guys that have played, very casually for years. I started playing, about 3 months ago, they have been routinely beating me for months. They took it easy on me, sometimes beat me to nil.

I took it, always accepted that I was bad, but I knew I'd get better. Well, I've got better, I beat the one guy almost as much as he beats me and the other still rinses me most of the time, but I've beat him.

Now they know I can beat them and I know I can beat them, I know it'll only be a matter of time until I'm as good as them both. I still get frustrated with myself occasionally, but I keep telling myself that I'm still learning.

So, you're not shit at squash. You're just new, and or playing someone much better than you. Persist and you will be rewarded. The only way you get better is to play someone better than you.

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On the subject of being a 'keeper in a Sunday League side, I found the most annoying part was teammates expecting you to come out and pluck crosses out of the air like confetti. There are International goalies who struggle to catch crosses yet I was expected to deal single-handedly with all of the opposition's corners!

I keep remembering stuff about being a keeper that pisses me off.

Other people shouting "keeper!"

That is such a TERRIBLE thing to do. I don't know why people think it helps.

I'm capable of making my own decision thanks. And if that decision is to stay on my line, then you shouting keeper is going to make the defender leave it, and all hell will break loose.

Shut the **** up!

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I always play as a goalkeeper. Hardly play football at all these days, but when I do I'm between the sticks. I like being able to command my defence, but you're right, it's bloody annoying when they try to tell you what to do. Goalkeeping is very instinctive, so someone suddenly shouting something at you is probably just going to **** things up.

People moaning about goalkeepers getting too much protection can be annoying, too. Admittedly, they sometimes have a point, but it's when people go on as if goalkeepers are wrapped up in cotton wool and intimate that this is somehow their own fault and reflects on their bravery. Goalkeepers are constantly chucking themselves through the air, or down at people's feet getting the risk of being kicked in the face (something that's happened to me on several occasions - but I love the feeling of rushing off your line and smothering the ball at an oncoming attacker's feet). You have to be brave, and mental, to be a good goalkeeper.

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Luckily the team I regularly play for know that I hate people shouting Keeper, so it doesn't happen anymore (or very rarely, and if it does they get a bollocking). But when I occasionally play for work or other teams and fill in in goal it happens a lot.

You're right about the protection thing. I think keepers do get too much protection in the air.

But I don't think they get enough protection on the ground.

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Spoilers. Once you know them you can never un-know them.

Back in the early 80s when the Alec Guinness version of le Carre's 'Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy' was on TV, I didn't see it, but I wasn't bothered because I wanted to read the book first. At the time I worked at a place that had Radio 2 on, and Terry Wogan decided to talk about TTSS - and give away the denoument. Pissed me off enough to stop me reading the book or watching the TV series or the recent film.

Now, over thirty years later, I'm finally reading the book. But I still remember what Wogan said, and I'm still annoyed that I KNOW WHO THE **** MOLE WAS. :angry:

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Apologies.

Specifically ones by companies, businesses, councils, any corporation. Don't apologise to me because you don't mean it. It is disingenuous b*ll*cks intended to placate me but it doesn't, it winds me up. You are not actually sorry for whatever the f*ck it is you have or haven't done for me. The extent of your sorrow is that you might lose my business, so you are sorry to your f**king shareholders. Not to me. Do not say sorry. Just f**king sort whatever it is out as fast as you can. I'm much more impressed by good service than I am by constant meaningless f**king apologies.

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Apologies.

Specifically ones by companies, businesses, councils, any corporation. Don't apologise to me because you don't mean it. It is disingenuous b*ll*cks intended to placate me but it doesn't, it winds me up. You are not actually sorry for whatever the f*ck it is you have or haven't done for me. The extent of your sorrow is that you might lose my business, so you are sorry to your f**king shareholders. Not to me. Do not say sorry. Just f**king sort whatever it is out as fast as you can. I'm much more impressed by good service than I am by constant meaningless f**king apologies.

Along thos elines - automated apologies. Ne wStreet Station, an automated announcer saying 'I am sorry for the delay'. What? You are a machine. How are you sorry? rocket polishers.

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People having a poo in the toilets at work

It shouldnt piss me off cos if you need to do a poo (maybe a little bit, maybe badly, it doesnt really matter) then ofc you must enthrone yourself and defecate at some time.

But it pisses me off anyway cos some blokes will just sit there, knowing someone has just walked into the bogs/is already there, and proper go for it. fart fart splash splash fart. It's gross man. I wouldnt do that, I would sit patiently until the other occupant left. This does raise problems if the other person in the toilet is also passing a solid. It's like a shitty mexican standoff. It's happened to me before, I couldnt hack it man, I had to leave and go to the toilet upstairs that was empty.

There was a discussion recently in the office in regard to toilet etiquette. The way our toilets are is as follows - 3 cubicles for the men, 4 for the women. 3 sinks. 2 hand dryers, one of each on all 3 floors. There are no urinals in the mens toilet. If you walk into the toilet and someone is in a cubicle, you should go into a cubicle which is not adjacent to the occupied one. Ergo, in the mens toilet, if the toilets are empty, you should not enter the middle one, as that would mean a second person entering the toilets would have no option but to enter an adjacent cubicle. It's really quite simple. It isnt enfored yet, but I'm goddamn working on it.

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