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AVFCforever1991

Things that piss you off that shouldn't

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**** bread knives.

 

That's why they say things are the best thing since sliced bread. 12,500 people die annually in America alone trying to slice their own bread. It kills more people than drunk drivers.

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He's a very clever man until he tries to talk about something that's not on the teleprompter.

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He's alright I can see why he might iritate sometimes, but he's alright, mostly everyone is alright, and I guess we all iritate sometimes.

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Fry's a lot better than Jonathan Ross who seems to be the choice for a lot of these backslapping evenings. Listening to Wossy's 'banter' is painful.

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I could never watch one of these award ceremonies with people celebrating themselves, Music shouldn't be a competition.

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Scottish football.

 

have you seen the 5 minute piece on SSN about what an amazing record breaking season celtic are having? no defeats, no goals conceded in something like 12 games now

 

yeah lets all celebrate it...

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12,500 people die annually in America alone trying to slice their own bread. It kills more people than drunk drivers.

 

Hmmmm, I'd say that can't possibly be true.  I bet it's nowhere near that many, where did you get that stat from?

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Day out with my fiancée today.

Decided to go to a shopping centre with the intention of buying her a belated Valentine present.

All going well. Bought her a designer sweatshirt she had wanted for some time and after a bite to eat we returned to the car.

On the homeward trek the car started to chuck, splatter and cough until we had to pull in. That was around 4.00pm.

I looked at the petrol gage and immediately thought we were empty which was surprising because before setting off on our day out my fiancée had taken the car to get some petrol while I got myself ready to go out.

So still with a smile on my face and inwardly cursing my fiancée to damnation I left my fiancée in the car while I walked back to a petrol station we had passed some ten minutes back on our journey home.

I returned with a canister of petrol and proceeded to top up. Fiancée puts key in ignition and the car starts to chuck and cough again and then my fiancée noted a red light signifying that the oil was empty.

So now with a for **** sake I slammed the car door shut and began the long walk back again to the petrol station by this time not really being able to feel my fingers with the cold.

By the time I returned it was dusk so torch out and topped up with oil. Key in ignition and **** chucky, coughy and stall again.

So since we were a half an hours drive away from my fiancee's parents house we rang her dad to come out with the toe rope and waited and waited and waited until after six before help arrived in the form of my fiancee's dad and her uncle.

Rope connected to both cars and off we went to my fiancées parents house.

Halfway there with the engine off and no brakes my fiancée hit the back of her father's car. Luckily no damage as the toe connector took most of the hit.

Finally arrived at the in laws so to speak (not yet married) and then pushed our car off the road just outside their home. Fiancées dad said he would contact his own mechanic in the morning and ask him to come out to see what was wrong with the car.

Fiancee's dad then gave my fiancée and I a lift home and by this time I was thinking more of the Valentine massacre than anything else and not a word was said.

About to climb into the bath when our phone rang. It was my fiancées dad.

'Tell us this and tell us no more' he asked with more than a hint of sarcasm. 'Did you take the car keys home with you?'

**** fiancée hadn't left the keys of our car with her dad so I will have to get the early bus tomorrow morning to bring them back down to her dad so that the mechanic can have a look.

Just **** off Valentine. I tried to be nice and looked what happened.

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Day out with my fiancée today.

Decided to go to a shopping centre with the intention of buying her a belated Valentine present.

All going well. Bought her a designer sweatshirt she had wanted for some time and after a bite to eat we returned to the car.

On the homeward trek the car started to chuck, splatter and cough until we had to pull in. That was around 4.00pm.

I looked at the petrol gage and immediately thought we were empty which was surprising because before setting off on our day out my fiancée had taken the car to get some petrol while I got myself ready to go out.

So still with a smile on my face and inwardly cursing my fiancée to damnation I left my fiancée in the car while I walked back to a petrol station we had passed some ten minutes back on our journey home.

I returned with a canister of petrol and proceeded to top up. Fiancée puts key in ignition and the car starts to chuck and cough again and then my fiancée noted a red light signifying that the oil was empty.

So now with a for **** sake I slammed the car door shut and began the long walk back again to the petrol station by this time not really being able to feel my fingers with the cold.

By the time I returned it was dusk so torch out and topped up with oil. Key in ignition and **** chucky, coughy and stall again.

So since we were a half an hours drive away from my fiancee's parents house we rang her dad to come out with the toe rope and waited and waited and waited until after six before help arrived in the form of my fiancee's dad and her uncle.

Rope connected to both cars and off we went to my fiancées parents house.

Halfway there with the engine off and no brakes my fiancée hit the back of her father's car. Luckily no damage as the toe connector took most of the hit.

Finally arrived at the in laws so to speak (not yet married) and then pushed our car off the road just outside their home. Fiancées dad said he would contact his own mechanic in the morning and ask him to come out to see what was wrong with the car.

Fiancee's dad then gave my fiancée and I a lift home and by this time I was thinking more of the Valentine massacre than anything else and not a word was said.

About to climb into the bath when our phone rang. It was my fiancées dad.

'Tell us this and tell us no more' he asked with more than a hint of sarcasm. 'Did you take the car keys home with you?'

**** fiancée hadn't left the keys of our car with her dad so I will have to get the early bus tomorrow morning to bring them back down to her dad so that the mechanic can have a look.

Just **** off Valentine. I tried to be nice and looked what happened.

 

 

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Well, whatever happens Morpheus, when you do take the keys round her old mans, just try not to **** him will ya?

 

:lol:

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If you'd got your bird a present on actual Valentine's Day instead of two days later, none of that would have happened now, would it?

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