Shillzz Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 My one and only rule: I will be permitted to kick anyone, and everyone, who has ever appeared on the front of hello magazine in the teeth, without any legal or social repercussions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyh29 Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 5. Americans shall be taught once and for all that they didn't win the war of Independence and that the language is called "English" and that there is no such thing as a Booo-eh ,its called a Buoy etc etc I object. When I started boating in the UK, after doing so for many years in the US, I thought people were telling me there was a 'boy' in the water. Utter confusion, followed by, "oh you mean a buoy (boo-eh). The boo-eh pronunciation is more in line with the French origin of the word if I am not mistaken; however, it does seem you do object to anything French, so point taken maybe. objection (and IP address) noted :-) Security we have a code 12 in Glasgow .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LockStockVilla Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 *grabs coat and runs* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSufferingVilla Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 I would reduce the world population from 7 Billion to about 500 Million. It would be bloody, merciless and cruel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrackpotForeigner Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 I would reduce the world population from 7 Billion to about 500 Million. It would be bloody, merciless and cruel.No need. There'll be a pandemic along soon enough to do your work for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted July 11, 2012 Moderator Share Posted July 11, 2012 Yellowstone can't be long now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legov Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Christ, hope you both aren't serious. Jesus F. Christ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSufferingVilla Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 I would reduce the world population from 7 Billion to about 500 Million. It would be bloody, merciless and cruel.No need. There'll be a pandemic along soon enough to do your work for you. Perhaps but the pandemic won't be so selective... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legov Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Yellowstone can't be long now. Guy seems to think otherwise Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrackpotForeigner Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Christ, hope you both aren't serious. Jesus F. Christ.I think you'll find that Jesus's middle name began with an "H". Everyone, including Homer Simpson, knows this. Christ knows what it stood for, though. On the subject of our inevitable collective doom, reading Bryson's "History of Nearly Everything" brought home to me how in the grand scheme, the existence of humans is a brief flourish of life sandwiched between catastrophic events (Yellowstone eruptions, meteor impacts, etc). The dinosaur era was another bit of meat in a sandwich, and there have no doubt been others. So as a ruler of the world you'd only be "king for a day" in the wider picture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted July 11, 2012 Moderator Share Posted July 11, 2012 Yellowstone can't be long now. Guy seems to think otherwise Well that's me categorically disproven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legov Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 I think you'll find that Jesus's middle name began with an "H". Everyone, including Homer Simpson, knows this. Christ knows what it stood for, though. I know, I deliberately changed it though :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrackpotForeigner Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 I would reduce the world population from 7 Billion to about 500 Million. It would be bloody, merciless and cruel.No need. There'll be a pandemic along soon enough to do your work for you. Perhaps but the pandemic won't be so selective... You're going to have to work quickly. Assuming it took 10 seconds to select Suarez as your first victim, you will be choosing your last victim in the year 4072 if you (and they) live that long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumerican Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Anyone playing music via their phone on public transport, without using headphones, will have their bollocks pulled out through their eye socket . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maqroll Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Black diamonds and pearls... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maqroll Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 for starters 1. Women would be banned from driving any car larger than a smart car , little Tarquin can easily fit inside this car as can his sister Chardonnay ... the rule will be relaxed slightly if the family have 4 children as whilst sticking the third child in the boot is acceptable , sticking 2 kids in the boot may be a little inhuman. 2. Children's names can only come of an approved list , Hello magazine isn't an acceptable source for picking your childs name 3. Chrisp65 shall be made minister of fashion for his efforts in drawing up acceptable fashion levels in his opening post 4. France shall be renamed Dustbin land and all the worlds waste shall be dumped there .. ( though i think someone already beat me to this one ) 5. Americans shall be taught once and for all that they didn't win the war of Independence and that the language is called "English" and that there is no such thing as a Booo-eh ,its called a Buoy etc etc Hmm...I suppose you could teach us that we didn't win the war...after all, you would be the ruler of the world. We'd have to pretend you were right! In fairness, we would have lost the war without the French chipping in at the end. But most war historians agree that the colonists indeed won the war, with the decisive battle being this one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maqroll Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Just seen a woman picking her nose with her little finger and depositing the yield in her mouth. Death penalty. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bickster Posted July 11, 2012 Moderator Share Posted July 11, 2012 Back on topic:- Umbrellas, anyone who uses one - firing squad, no trial Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisp65 Posted July 11, 2012 Author Share Posted July 11, 2012 I'd stop all state funding of art or art 'installations'. I loves a bit of art me, but the thought of paying some tit from Guatemala or Belgium or wherever to come over here and interpret modern living through the medium of kites...aargh. Artists are supposed to suffer in the hope of being discovered. Women stopping at the bottom of escalators or in shop doorways can legitimately be pushed over and then you can shout 'see what you made me do?' at them. Niche internet dating sites to allow you a good look at the merchandise without the tedium of signing up via a verified e-mail address. Obviously I base this on pure speculation as to what I presume probably happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LockStockVilla Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Women stopping at the bottom of escalators or in shop doorways can legitimately be pushed over and then you can shout 'see what you made me do?' at them. Yes! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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