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how would you describe getting hit in the balls?


leemond2008
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It's like getting your batteries taken out.Not only does it hurt like ****, it renders you useless for the next few minutes.

Getting hit in the balls playing football is the worst, because you try and get up and get stuck back in. Never works!

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I'd imagine the equivalent for them would be getting a flap caught in a zip ?
Nah. I reckon that would be like getting your foreskin in a zip. Yes, it hurts, but it doesn't have the shock to the system effect that a hard blow to the goolies does.
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Are there not some folk who get sexual gratification from being smashing in the ballox?
I am hitting my balls with a mallet.

They are black and blue.

My God, what AM I doing???

That's right: playing croquet.

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ask them if they would want to be double penetrated by monster cocks whilst having a bout of the norovirus.

I know a couple of girls who would love that!

O RLY? >_>

I guess Irreverntad knows a few girls from extremetube.com

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ask them if they would want to be double penetrated by monster cocks whilst having a bout of the norovirus.

I know a couple of girls who would love that!

O RLY? >_>

I guess Irreverntad knows a few girls from extremetube.com

I thought he preferred the scat stuff?

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I'm trying hard to form an apt description. The last time I copped one straight to the happy-sack was playing in goal at college when I was on the receiving end of a nut-shot from one those cheap, plastic and ree-hee-hee-donk-ulously heavy footballs.

Now, I've taken a fair few hits in my time; people have attempted to violently redefine my facial features through competitive sport, I've had my chest repeatedly kneed at by a drunken reveller twice my size and last year my little finger was left pointing in the opposite direction to the rest of my hand following a disagreement with the ground. Getting hit in the balls though...

I suppose the initial sensation is one of time grinding to a halt. Everything around you stops and the only parts of yourself that retain mobility are your jaw (which attempts to detach from your head as you release a gutteral drone followed by a high-pitch whine) and your hands (which instinctively move to cradle the shattered remnants of your testicles). Then the pain. Oh God, the pain.

You topple forward, flat on your face but you don't notice as the only thing you can feel is this sensation of having the most vital, tender part of your body wrenched in one direction with sheer pneumatic power whilst the rest of you is pulled away in t'other. It is as if you were to remove a prominent mole from the middle of your armpit with a pair of blunt nail-clippers, but the mole contained all your major organs. But the pain doesn't subside. It just... remains.

You gradually fall on your side and, naturally, want to adopt the fetal position but the only cogent thoughts you can form are screaming at you, telling you that the slightest movement of your legs will tug on your nuts and the pain will be multiplied to it's very zenith. You want to cry, but your eyes and mouth are completely dry.

It is now, for the first time since you were struck do you realise that you haven't actually breathed in or out yet. You talk a huge gulp of air and immediately an intense wave of nausea courses through your gut. You want to wretch, but convulsing will jar your body and rip your balls from the cradle of your fragile grasp. Your stomach feels heavy, as if you've swallowed a solid brick of lead and it's corroding you from the inside out.

You start to notice the world around you again. Everything is blurry and you feel dizzy, but not playground-spinning-around-for-fun-like-a-'copter dizzy; the sort of dizzy that only NASA's human-centrifuge can replicate. It is another 5 minutes before you can even think about trying to stand and a further 30 until the pain begins to subdue.

But you don't forget. You don't ever forget. This will be with you forever. This was your Vietnam.

just showed this post to my team leader

she said ''good god, what is wrong with these people...do they not have lives or jobs''

I told her they probably all have jobs and that is why they are posting on here whilst they should be working...pretty much like im doing

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tl;dr I used to play cricket - then I took a ball to my unprotected scrote.

As a young teen I and a couple of mates decided to sign up for our school cricket team, depsite not liking cricket at all. Seemed like a bit of a lark - and it was, for the most part. On one occasion, after school during training, we hit the nets. I tried a bit of bowling, pretty useless. Was told to do some batting, and to make sure I put on a box. They were all sitting there, stained and yellow, in, well, a box. A box of boxes. Me and my chums sure did laugh - we're not putting on one of those! Imagine where they've been!. So we braved the nets - completely boxless.

We were playing with cricket balls, not tennis balls or anything. First bowl straight into my bollocks.

Oh for that time back. If I could go back and change one thing in my life, it would be NOT to ridicule the horrifically unhygenic box of boxes, NOT to be so naive as to think I couldnt possibly be smashed square in the nads. I WOULD wear a box, as I did on every occasion afterwards.

I had a hot sweat, I couldn't breath, legs went wobbly and had to sit down, was seeing stars, and was generally in a bit of a state. Nothing like has happened since, thank talos - I always wear a box now, just in case.

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