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Irreverentad's Relationship Advice Thread


irreverentad

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48 minutes ago, MCU said:

What's an acceptable time to be single for before 'moving on'?

I just told this girl I've been single for 7 months after a 5 year relationship and she seem'd shocked it hasn't been that long. So I'm expecting to be ghosted here aswell 🤣 FML.

I would have thought 7 months would be more than enough. 

My relationship is 15 years so far, by this logic if we split up I have to wait nearly 2 years? 

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On 16/06/2021 at 12:54, lapal_fan said:

Plant a tree together in a lovely park.

When you've finished, just look at her through your eyebrows and say "that's not the only seed I plan on planting today" and then wink at her repeatedly, whilst repeatedly putting your index finger on your right hand into a hole made by thumb and index finger on your other hand.

If she runs away, just chase her, take her down and ask her why she's running away.  If she says "because I hate you and I'm scared", just look sad at her and respect her decision that you're an ugly **** who doesn't deserve the love of a partner.

Then just go down a brothel and buy the finest prostitute you can afford. 

take notes GIF by Hey Duggee

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6 hours ago, MCU said:

What's an acceptable time to be single for before 'moving on'?

I just told this girl I've been single for 7 months after a 5 year relationship and she seem'd shocked it hasn't been that long. So I'm expecting to be ghosted here aswell 🤣 FML.

A lot of people don't stay single for long... some just monkey-branch from one relationship to another. 

Ask her for the official guidance notes for what is acceptable in being single after a relationship. Hopefully there is a Government matrix for it ;)

 

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10 minutes ago, Xela said:

A lot of people don't stay single for long... some just monkey-branch from one relationship to another. 

Ask her for the official guidance notes for what is acceptable in being single after a relationship. Hopefully there is a Government matrix for it ;)

 

I think the current government’s guidance is for you to commence your new relationship before you end your last one.

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Like others have said, 7 months single after a 5 year relationship should be sufficiently long enough not to provoke a “wow, you’ve moved on quickly!” style response. 

Everyone and every relationship is different, but as a general rule of thumb I probably would only be surprised if they said they had only broken up with someone within a month or so before embarking on a new relationship. Maybe she thinks you’re still into your ex, maybe she’s been out with someone who pined for his ex and she doesn’t want to risk going through that again. All guesswork.

If it helped matters, I’d possibly be tempted to say the final six months with your ex, you were technically together but it had pretty much ended. Just if you feel like it would help. 

 

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8 hours ago, MCU said:

What's an acceptable time to be single for before 'moving on'?

I just told this girl I've been single for 7 months after a 5 year relationship and she seem'd shocked it hasn't been that long. So I'm expecting to be ghosted here aswell 🤣 FML.

Asked the wife and she agrees that 7 months is absolutely fine (noting that one away for future use in case I ever need it - hopefully not though) and that apparently anything more then 6 months implies psychological damage. 

To me, if she thinks 7 months isn't long enough to get over an ex it implies that she was or is still very hung up on an ex herself. Personally I'd steer clear if I was you. 

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19 hours ago, Mark Albrighton said:

Like others have said, 7 months single after a 5 year relationship should be sufficiently long enough not to provoke a “wow, you’ve moved on quickly!” style response. 

Everyone and every relationship is different, but as a general rule of thumb I probably would only be surprised if they said they had only broken up with someone within a month or so before embarking on a new relationship. Maybe she thinks you’re still into your ex, maybe she’s been out with someone who pined for his ex and she doesn’t want to risk going through that again. All guesswork.

If it helped matters, I’d possibly be tempted to say the final six months with your ex, you were technically together but it had pretty much ended. Just if you feel like it would help. 

 

Not really a metric for things like this is there. Just say I know it’s been a while as my previous partners head is like cement it’s that frozen in the freezer and see what she says.

 

procrastinate silence of the lambs GIF

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This is the shit no-one misses when they're in a relationship. 'Oh you got a girl's number last night did you? Well done! But . . . FFS man put that phone down, it's only been 15 hours since you met her, you mustn't send her or a message or you'll come across like a desperate sock-jerker who idolises Norman Bates . . .'

[Fast forward]

'What do you mean you haven't called her yet, it's 30 hours since you met! Too late now, she thinks that you think you're a playboy who will inevitably sleep with her best friend, so better just delete her number and pretend it never happened . . .'

Can't even opt out of this moronic shit either.

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12 hours ago, foreveryoung said:

I used to hate it when you meet someone new, an after a week or 2 us lads generally know if it's the one. But then it's the worry that they don't feel the same way, and could take up to 3 months dating until you know they properly like you, I mean you could never ask could you.

I met a girl in my youth, went out out with her for 6 months, having everything that comes with it (wink wink), until one day I say "I guess we're boyfriend and girlfriend now then",  jokingly, for her to say, "I don't want a relationship, I'm not ready", my heart dropped, cracking girl too, she never come round either. I specifically remember we was out bank holiday and she went all funny, so I dropped her home early, for her to say things aren't going to work with us,  that was it, never saw her again. Sounds a bit gay, but loved that girl, I really did.

So you were happily dating for 6 months and it was only until you mentioned being boyfriend and girlfriend that she turned cold?

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14 minutes ago, leemond2008 said:

ah it didn't, she bailed on me the bitch, got something pencilled in for next weekend instead now

happy jack grealish GIF by Aston Villa FCjackie chan yaw GIF

Edt: Well F me, didn't notice it was Grealish in the gif 💙

Edited by Tegis
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On 28/06/2021 at 10:51, MCU said:

What's an acceptable time to be single for before 'moving on'?

12 hours.

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22 hours ago, foreveryoung said:

I met a girl in my youth, went out out with her for 6 months, having everything that comes with it (wink wink), until one day I say "I guess we're boyfriend and girlfriend now then",  jokingly, for her to say, "I don't want a relationship, I'm not ready", my heart dropped, cracking girl too, she never come round either. I specifically remember we was out bank holiday and she went all funny, so I dropped her home early, for her to say things aren't going to work with us,  that was it, never saw her again. Sounds a bit gay, but loved that girl, I really did.

it can be absolutely devastating when a relationship ends like that. To go from 100 to 0 overnight. It might sound hyperbolic but its like a death really. You suddenly don't have that person you adore in your life anymore and you can't put any closure on it. Ultimately time is the healer. 

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