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Irreverentad's Relationship Advice Thread


irreverentad

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My best mate is single and he's been using a dating app called hinge - its linked to FB but extends to friends of friends so expands your circle. He's very positive about it.

Other than that @StefanAVFC you could get an English bulldog. Mine is a complete chick magnet. I tell my wife all the time I regret not getting him 10 years ago :D

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I have an idea in mind that choirs would be mostly populated by folks who are 40+, and are probably quite pious, and as such aren't filth. Am I wrong. 

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16 minutes ago, hogso said:

I have an idea in mind that choirs would be mostly populated by folks who are 40+, and are probably quite pious, and as such aren't filth. Am I wrong. 

It's a uni choir so I hope not :D

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16 minutes ago, hogso said:

I have an idea in mind that choirs would be mostly populated by folks who are 40+, and are probably quite pious, and as such aren't filth. Am I wrong. 

the pious are often filthy

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14 hours ago, StefanAVFC said:

You're very late :D

I haven't been dating anyone since January. I went on a few dates with a girl i really liked around March time but she chewed me up and spat me out.

They can be ruthless brutal even. To answer earlier your question the apps seem to be taking over. But getting yourself involved in activities or interests that matter to you is a start. I did greek dancing for a bit and met some girls there. So in your case go to a conservative conference as your such a pro Tory :P

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On 12/07/2018 at 19:54, StefanAVFC said:

I'm joining a choir at the university nearby. I always sang through high school/uni and there will be plenty of girls.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

This is not dating related.

Mum has just been through hell with legal proceedings against her two brothers over their parents care and finance.

They've been in court for months at least, possibly getting on to years now.

Absolutely torn the family, irreparable damage has been done and zero chance of any amicable ending.

I am super proud of Mum. She has fought the good fight and stuck to her guns without shooting anyone down in the process. She let intentions reveal themselves so to speak.

The consequence is though that both her parents are in their final years and the conflict has dominated the times spent together , and without doubt played a massive role in the deterioration of my Grandfathers health, the stress and anguish of seeing his children so conflicted beyond repair has been too much for him. Thankfully my Grandmother doesn't speak any English and had dementia before all this played out, making her oblivious to what's transpired as far as I can tell, yet there are issues unique to her situation which needed addressing.

Long story short, Mum is going to lose both her parents soon and she's been up to her neck with the legal battles, as she's representing herself. She's no stranger to hard times but i can tell this one has taken a bit out of her spirit.

I want to do something to remind her how brilliant a Mother, Daughter and person she is. She's even treated her brothers with decency in what has been a bitter and callous assault on her from their end. She operates with integrity, understanding and a wealth of class that money can't buy. There's usually evil on both sides of a conflict but the only thing which I can say she's guilty of is rubbing people the wrong way with her righteousness and conviction when she feels someone is out of line. Her cause is always noble and often selfless in nature.

Anyway, probably not the most lighthearted post I'll make on VT but any ideas would be welcome.

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8 hours ago, NurembergVillan said:

If you haven't already, I'd start by telling her everything you've just told us.

Thanks, I did very briefly tell her I was feeling for her and acknowledged what she was going through, she started to tear up, so I think I will expand on that and write her a letter.

She's the only one, not one other member of the family, has taken on her parents welfare as a personal responsibility.  If I'm honest members of  my family have proven themselves to be thoroughly lacking in any moral fiber, and the rest for god knows what reason, have not the discernment to see who's really responsible for the downfall of relationships, perhaps out of a lack of interest in getting involved, it's been disastrous. I'm not sure the story is appropriate or even of interest for VT, or if my Mum would appreciate me disclosing it. So I will leave it there.

So thanks, NV. Telling her I'm in awe of her efforts is probably more meaningful than anything else I have to offer.

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8 minutes ago, HanoiVillan said:

@A'Villan the other thing you can do - depending obviously on work times, geography and so forth - is to take some of the other labour away from her, so helping with weekly shops, mowing lawns, watering plants etc. 

I tend to accompany her once a fortnight on her visits to see her parents (she visits them three times a week) and I did all the work on the maintenance of their property up until recently, when administrators took charge. She has a monumental workload though and sudoku in bed seems to be her only respite, so I could definitely lend a hand with the labour.

Good shout.

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