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irreverentad

Irreverentad's Relationship Advice Thread

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My head is in a mess got married 10 months ago things where a bit ropey for a few months before but nothing too serious.

Then a month after the wedding job circumstances changed put a load of pressure on the relationship and it was a really hard time but we got through it just and managed to come out the other side with her being pregnant (doesn't sound the smartest thing but it wasn't exactly planned that way).

Now things are back on the worse side I just feel too much has been said and done to ever be able to feel the same way as before again. But we are 6 weeks away from baby being due.

While this has all been going on a couple who we know more her friends then mine have split up me and her have been chatting and get on stupidly well and has been giving out very strong hints that she wants a bit more then just a friendly chat

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Just remember to lock the door while you're thinking about it

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17 hours ago, lapal_fan said:

To be fair, I went along with my now wife and mom to a horse riding thing - it was embarrassing at first, but it was actually pretty fun.  And all we were doing was going round in a circle in a big barn thing - I felt like John Martson B)

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?

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Just to be clear I have no intention of doing anything with this women it is just messing with my head when the women who you are with can be that distant and nasty.

And there is somebody else who you are getting along with

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I'd immediately backpeddle away from the friend for a while - avoid all temptation. Focus on the kid. Above all else you don't want additional stress on the baby or the baby's mother at this time. If you and the partner aren't meant to be, then so be it, but rash decisions in straining moments are unwise to say the least.

Has your partner always been that way or is just in the past few months? With the baby on the way, it has to be worth considering options like counselling etc to try and find healthy or safe spaces to work out what you both want from the relationship. But if it doesn't work, an unpleasant environment in the long run is not good for kids either.

 

Easy to say all this on the outside I know etc but good luck.

 

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Shit situation is about to get better with the birth of baby, but then worse as baby grows and becomes increasingly dependant and harder work.

It's incredibly rewarding to be a parent, but it can wear a bit thin if baby is unsettled, you think one thing but your other half thinks another, everything is a compromise.

The immediate happiness is amazing though, try and go with that.

Good luck!

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19 hours ago, Xela said:

Where on earth do you meet these girls? A Nazi dating site?! 

How did you leave things with her?

Maybe my POF profile photo shouldn't have me stood in front of a Panzer, with a toothbrush moustache. In my defence, there have only been two racists, one woman that turned up outside my house after one date, and the one that told me about a dream involving child molestation. That's only 4 terrible dates, I don't post about the good ones!

tried to give her the benefit of the doubt and give her a way to back out of it and said something like "I don't think you're supposed to call them that anymore" (Yeah, I know), to which she replied "It's alright, there aren't any here." :mellow:

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No wonder if you met on POF. That site is basically chlamydia. 

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Match? eharmony? 

Basically the free ones are more likely to be filled with time stealers and attention seekers. That's not to say there aren't genuine people on the free sites, there obviously is, but you need to sort through the chaff more often than not

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36 minutes ago, Xela said:

you need to sort through the chaff 

Chance would be a fine thing. :blush:

I'll report back on how many racists I find on eharmony. I didn't have much luck on Match.

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On 06/02/2016 at 14:59, Davkaus said:

Maybe my POF profile photo shouldn't have me stood in front of a Panzer, with a toothbrush moustache. In my defence, there have only been two racists, one woman that turned up outside my house after one date, and the one that told me about a dream involving child molestation. That's only 4 terrible dates, I don't post about the good ones!

tried to give her the benefit of the doubt and give her a way to back out of it and said something like "I don't think you're supposed to call them that anymore" (Yeah, I know), to which she replied "It's alright, there aren't any here." :mellow:

Ah, my mistake, I was getting you mixed up with the "Nazi dinner" girl.

But I think I've heard you mention the child molestation one before. That was a keeper, shouldn't have let her go there mate.

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