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Irreverentad's Relationship Advice Thread


irreverentad

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Nah, she's ginger.

8 pints?

Of what, Garlic Mayonnaise?

Well you could uses some on her badly packed kebab.......

Anyway chaps...off for a power wank to the above work of art. Have a good one!

:lol:

And you fella.

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I feel like a bit of a shit today

Went out with my managers missus last night, she's pretty much my best mate, any way we ended up getting into a row and then ended up in my bedroom, my gaffa knows she was out with me and I awoke to 8 missed calls and 3 txt messages, she was round here till 1. O'clock in the afternoon and it was amazing...**** knows what is gunna happen from here though

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While it takes two to tango id feel like like a complete shit aswell. Bit high and mighty i know but i dont think i could ever sleep with a girl who has a fella as I wouldnt want to feel how he will when he finds/found out.

Anyway....

Woohoo! Im going out for dinner with that 36 year old next week. Hopefully this goes better than my previous first dates.

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I feel like a bit of a shit today

Went out with my managers missus last night, she's pretty much my best mate, any way we ended up getting into a row and then ended up in my bedroom, my gaffa knows she was out with me and I awoke to 8 missed calls and 3 txt messages, she was round here till 1. O'clock in the afternoon and it was amazing...**** knows what is gunna happen from here though

Update.......

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Sod you all then, ill congratulate myself instead. :cry:

Don't be soft. Dinner is the easy bit. When you have spent an evening smashing in more doors than the Drug Squad, then the congratulations will come.

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You underestimate my ability to even get a person of the opposite sex to agree to go to dinner. In how unlikely this event actually is, its paramount to Joseph Fritzl asking his local council if he can build a new family run b&b and getting a 'yes'.

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Hmmm trivial little issue......

I cannot stop the girlfriend from laughing before we have sex.

Last week we were messing around in the bedroom and she said that she would like to spice things up with a bit of dirty talk. I agreed. The problem is that she was shy, as was I, and I was unaware of the boundaries and I didn't want tho leap straight into calling her a dirty bitch!

Therefore as a starter for ten I asked her "how much she wanted my 'love-rod'?"

She burst out laughing (proper curled up, on the bed, tears of laughter). Now after 4 attempts just before we get down to it, she bursts out laughing while uttering the word 'love-rod'!

It is irritating and needs to stop!!!

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Hmmm trivial little issue......

I cannot stop the girlfriend from laughing before we have sex.

Last week we were messing around in the bedroom and she said that she would like to spice things up with a bit of dirty talk. I agreed. The problem is that she was shy, as was I, and I was unaware of the boundaries and I didn't want tho leap straight into calling her a dirty bitch!

Therefore as a starter for ten I asked her "how much she wanted my 'love-rod'?"

She burst out laughing (proper curled up, on the bed, tears of laughter). Now after 4 attempts just before we get down to it, she bursts out laughing while uttering the word 'love-rod'!

It is irritating and needs to stop!!!

:crylaugh: That has just had me in tears. Brilliant.

In terms of a solution, slap her, call her a dirty bitch and then, as Shillzz said, DHUTWU.

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