Paddy's "Things that cheer you up"

[AvfcRigo82]

10 hours ago, Davkaus said:

@chrisp65 makes a good point. Stop going on about pizza, lads.

I think it's a shame that delivery places don't often do calzones.

You can't beat a calzone.  

[lapal_fan]

16 minutes ago, AvfcRigo82 said:

You can't beat a calzone.  

#

Edited February 5, 2019 by lapal_fan

[villa4europe]

there is a turkish pizza place in kiddy that not only does calzones but for about £8 will do you a chicken parmesan, chips and salad filling a medium size pizza box 

you can feel your arteries tightening as you eat it

[BOF]

On 02/02/2019 at 09:22, chrisp65 said:

26 pages on which is the best pizza to have delivered to the door.

This is why we have to have Brexit you snowflakes.

Get off your arses and walk down the chip shop for proper food. 

Soon you'll have to go out and kill your own pizza.

[NurembergVillan]

20 minutes ago, BOF said:

Soon you'll have to go out and kill your own pizza.

I've been planting crusts in the garden since October. Looking forward to my pizza tree in the spring!

[chrisp65]

I've been studying it, in depth, like really really studying it.

It appears to be an open cheese and tomato sandwich, heated up in an oven.

But for about £12.

 

Chrispy's Pizza Emporium and Home Delivery Service opens this coming Friday.

For an extra fiver, we'll chew the **** thing for you.

 

[Mandy Lifeboats]

We have employed a new colleague. She is from Germany. She has just been given her National Insurance number. 

It begins S S

Ouch. 

[sidcow]

My German Uncle was a young boy during the war.  His older brother was press ganged into the army on his 16th birthday and had to man an anti aircraft gun.  He didn't want to do it but they threatened to shoot him so he just used to shoot up into the sky nearly but not quite at the aircraft. 

[mjmooney]

1 hour ago, Mandy Lifeboats said:

We have employed a new colleague. She is from Germany. She has just been given her National Insurance number. 

It begins S S

Ouch. 

She could get it tattooed on her arm. 

[sidcow]

On 02/02/2019 at 00:33, il_serpente said:

I feel sorry for you Brits if either Dominos or Pizza Hut is even in contention for best pizza.  Every place I've lived in the US has a number of pizza places far superior to anything they produce.   The good places are usually just an independent place or part of a small, local chain.  Dominos was what we'd order late at night in college because it was still open, cheap, delivered, and after a few beers tasted just good enough to be worth the effort of eating.

The problem with the UK is people are obsessed with chains and knowing what they are going to get. 

If you opened an independent pizza restaurant with a vastly superior product and similar pricing next door to Domino's it would be a desolate empty place whilst people piled into Domino's. 

It's also destroying the UK pub.  Nothing warms my heart more than walking into a unique pub but most people seem to prefer some identikit chain pub which are everywhere.  It's getting harder and harder to find an independent pub. 

[mjmooney]

Just now, sidcow said:

It's also destroying the UK pub.  Nothing warms my heart more than walking into a unique pub but most people seem to prefer some identikit chain pub which are everywhere.  It's getting harder and harder to find an independent pub. 

Yep. This for me falls under 'things you don't get'. I cannot stand chain pubs, can't see why anybody would like them. 

[chrisp65]

21 minutes ago, sidcow said:

My German Uncle was a young boy during the war.  His older brother was press ganged into the army on his 16th birthday and had to man an anti aircraft gun.  He didn't want to do it but they threatened to shoot him so he just used to shoot up into the sky nearly but not quite at the aircraft. 

Apparently, that's the case for an awful lot of conscripts of any persuasion. Armies have a hard time getting recruits to shoot low enough to actually hurt anyone.

I think. Though it might be a myth I've just dreamt up.

[mjmooney]

1 hour ago, chrisp65 said:

Apparently, that's the case for an awful lot of conscripts of any persuasion. Armies have a hard time getting recruits to shoot low enough to actually hurt anyone.

I think. Though it might be a myth I've just dreamt up.

Nope, it's true. The U.S. Army commissioned a guy called S. L. A. Marshall to interview infantrymen after combat (I think it was in the Korean War). His report came out as a book called "Men Against Fire". Turned out that, in a firefight, most of the shooting was done by only a handful of soldiers (usually veterans and NCOs) - the vast majority never fired their weapons at all. 

[mjmooney]

Another good story: 

I once spoke to an old feller whose job during WWII was to inspect the beach defences (antitank obstacles, etc.) along the east coast. One day he was out on the beach when a German aircraft came over, looking to shoot up said defences. The pilot flew in low while this lad was hightailing it towards cover - and gave him a friendly wave. Once he was behind cover, the plane discharged his guns harmlessly into the sand, waved again, and flew off. This happened a few more times over the next couple of weeks, always with the same wave (now gratefully returned). And then he stopped coming, never to be seen again. My friend said he often wondered what happened to him, and sincerely hoped he survived the war. 

[tonyh29]

5 minutes ago, mjmooney said:

Nope, it's true. The U.S. Army commissioned a guy called S. L. A. Marshall to interview infantrymen after combat (I think it was in the Korean War). His report came out as a book called "Men Against Fire". Turned out that, in a firefight, most of the shooting was done by only a handful of soldiers (usually veterans and NCOs) - the vast majority never fired their weapons at all. 

I thought Marshall’s work had been found lacking any credible evidence and was deemed to be extremely flawed i.e  asking a medic did you fire your gun without taking into account they were a medic and thus not really likely to be firing it  ,  he also kinda carried out group discussions and extrapolated data to suit whilst ignoring other data 

 

[mjmooney]

1 minute ago, tonyh29 said:

I thought Marshall’s work had been found lacking any credible evidence and was deemed to be extremely flawed i.e  asking a medic did you fire your gun without taking into account they were a medic and thus not really likely to be firing it  ,  he also kinda carried out group discussions and extrapolated data to suit whilst ignoring other data 

 

Quite possibly. I the conclusions are still broadly true though - in our culture at any rate, it's quite difficult to get people to kill each other, particularly face-to-face.

[chrisp65]

So, WWII anecdotes.

When I was a kid, I'm guessing about 14 / 15 years old we were on holiday in Germany. My dad had a Vauxhall Cavalier which was kind of an Opel but with a sloping nose.

The car was parked, my parents had gone off to do whatever and I was stood next to the car waiting. I spotted an old guy checking out the car, he sort of circled it then walked up to me pretty much toe to toe.

in a stereotypical German accent, he said: 'British? You are British?'

with nowhere to step back as I was up against the car: 'yes'

German dude, in my face: 'I was prisoner of war, 1943 to 1946.'

me: 'ok'

German dude: 'was best time of my life, loved it, do you know Gloucester? I still go to Gloucester on holiday.'

 

[sharkyvilla]

My Grandad used to tell a story of when was stationed in India in WWII, he was blind in one eye and his general eyesight deteriorating, but he was left in charge of getting some of the locals to load a plane with supplies to go into somewhere else.  He didn't realise that as soon as they were loading it, some other locals were emptying it from the other side of the plane and it ended up reaching its destination virtually empty.  He got disciplined quite severely but he said he didn't really care, fair play to them.

[Wainy316]

10 hours ago, chrisp65 said:

So, WWII anecdotes.

When I was a kid, I'm guessing about 14 / 15 years old we were on holiday in Germany. My dad had a Vauxhall Cavalier which was kind of an Opel but with a sloping nose.

The car was parked, my parents had gone off to do whatever and I was stood next to the car waiting. I spotted an old guy checking out the car, he sort of circled it then walked up to me pretty much toe to toe.

in a stereotypical German accent, he said: 'British? You are British?'

with nowhere to step back as I was up against the car: 'yes'

German dude, in my face: 'I was prisoner of war, 1943 to 1946.'

me: 'ok'

German dude: 'was best time of my life, loved it, do you know Gloucester? I still go to Gloucester on holiday.'

 

Conversely it probably would have been a pretty sweet deal (as a white, non Jewish, British soldier), to have been captured by the Germans really early on into the war.

[mjmooney]

1 minute ago, Wainy316 said:

Conversely it probably would have been a pretty sweet deal (as a white, non Jewish, British soldier), to have been captured by the Germans really early on into the war.

Not sure if serious.