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Paddy's "Things that cheer you up"


rjw63

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I'm the nice healthy height of 6'2. An ideal height I reckon. It's above the 6' margin so I'm not classed as "short" but not into "How's the weather up there" territory

You look nowhere near that height.

Are you reading centimetres instead of inches?

I slouch!

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It cheers me up that I have no Bloonose scum on my Facebook.

Why?

 

Because from what I've seen on another persons FB, today is "Happy Obafemi Martins Day".

 

And the drooling retard that posted that then went on to mention how they won the cup in 1963 in front of a silent "Vile Park". Even though the micro-brain that posted this comment was two years old at the time.

 

Every single last one of 'em, obsessed and brain-dead.

 

Lucky man. I still have a few nose mates on my news feed. It never fails to amuse me, that the majority will have "zulu", "bluenose", "bcfc" as part of their name. I constantly wind my mate up that all he ever talks about is Villa. Plus he always ends everything he writes with "KRO SOTV". I asked him if he writes it on his mother's birthday cards too!   

 

Indeed - even blokes aged over 50 that I have seen using FB post "KRO SOTV" after virtually any comment. Sad bastards.

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Filled up with petrol today and stopped it bang on £73.00 without trying ... none of this stopping at £72.68 and slowly nudging my way up only to end up at £73.01 

 

nope bang straight in .. i literally strutted into the shop to pay , I just know the bored looking man behind the counter was in awe and just playing it nonchalant , he'll probably go home tonight and tell his kids all about me

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I'm going to kidnap some kids so I can tell them about it.

 

What?  It's quicker than Stevo's way!

that depends if you can kidnap a kid in 30 secs or not

 

 

 

oh wait you meant the whole 9 month caboodle

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Filled up with petrol today and stopped it bang on £73.00 without trying ... none of this stopping at £72.68 and slowly nudging my way up only to end up at £73.01 

 

nope bang straight in .. i literally strutted into the shop to pay , I just know the bored looking man behind the counter was in awe and just playing it nonchalant , he'll probably go home tonight and tell his kids all about me

 

Ha! Well beat this.  I put exactly £20 in.  Went to the till only to be told "That's £20.01 sir".  "No it bloody isn't" I protested.  The guy behind the counter then had to get out and have a look on the forecourt. He relented and said "oh there must be some mistake".  Cue me strolling out past a long queue after handing him a £20 note with a big grin on my face (yes, it's only a penny but still). 

Edited by trekka
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Filled up with petrol today and stopped it bang on £73.00 without trying ... none of this stopping at £72.68 and slowly nudging my way up only to end up at £73.01 

 

nope bang straight in .. i literally strutted into the shop to pay , I just know the bored looking man behind the counter was in awe and just playing it nonchalant , he'll probably go home tonight and tell his kids all about me

 

Ha! Well beat this.  I put exactly £20 in.  Went to the till only to be told "That's £20.01 sir".  "No it bloody isn't" I protested.  The guy behind the counter then had to get out and have a look on the forecourt. He relented and said "oh there must be some mistake".  Cue me strolling out past a long queue after handing him a £20 note with a big grin on my face (yes, it's only a penny but still). 

 

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