Brumerican Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Does anyone else spit polish at the end? Eh??? When it looks like you can wipe no more, just spit on some bog roll and have one last swoop. Youd be surprised what comes up. Its not as if its disgusting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B6 to E6 Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I'm a sitter, broken many a toilet seat in the process. Don't think I like the idea of standing up, what about the smearage !! Yep - I quite often have to refix the bog seat after it has been dislodged by too much leaning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peterms Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 One has one's butler do it. Just as soon as the fellow's finished cleaning out one's moat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSufferingVilla Posted May 19, 2009 Author Share Posted May 19, 2009 Question to you sitters. Have any of you experienced a German toilet, i.e: one that uses "the shelf"? When shitting into such toilets your crap falls onto a shelf mere inches from the place your arse is suspended. It is believed German's use "the shelf" to examine thier crap to ensure it is of uniform size and shape and if not they then adjust their diets accordingly to shit more efficiently. My point being if you are a sitter and were to use the shelf the ods are pretty high that upon dropping your hand down there with the paper for a swipe you will no doubt make hard contact with the shit on the shelf. thoughts? Comments? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeFoSho Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Question to you sitters. Have any of you experienced a German toilet, i.e: one that uses "the shelf"? They have those at Centre Parcs. Those of us sitters who use the 'leaning' technique are unaffected by it as the wiping takes place level with the top of the bowl. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LondonLax Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Does anyone else spit polish at the end? Eh??? When it looks like you can wipe no more, just spit on some bog roll and have one last swoop. Youd be surprised what comes up. Its not as if its disgusting. If you don't you end up with skid marks in the underwear! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B6 to E6 Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Made me remember this from Viz... 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sled Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I'm surprised no nurses have posted, as its actually considered unhygenic to wipe towards your genitals from back to front, they wont do that in hospital. Always front to back. I've seen posters in hospitals warning of the incorrect way of wiping.When you say posters do you mean people who post on here? :? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumerican Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I cant wait for the " How do you dispose of your jizz after a barclays " thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnsonp Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 You commoners, do you people not have bidets? quote] I have one but never quite worked out how the f**k to use it (I know how to turn the tap on) :oops: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
savolover Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 i use a sooty puppet whilst squatting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumerican Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I'm surprised no nurses have posted, as its actually considered unhygenic to wipe towards your genitals from back to front, they wont do that in hospital. Always front to back. I've seen posters in hospitals warning of the incorrect way of wiping.When you say posters do you mean people who post on here? :? I often tour hospitals advocating the benefits of the "spit polish" technique and the " reaching through your legs whilst sat down " concept. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peterms Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I'm surprised no nurses have posted, as its actually considered unhygenic to wipe towards your genitals from back to front, they wont do that in hospital. Always front to back. I've seen posters in hospitals warning of the incorrect way of wiping.When you say posters do you mean people who post on here? :? I often tour hospitals advocating the benefits of the "spit polish" technique and the " reaching through your legs whilst sat down " concept. It's nice to have a hobby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coda Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I can't believe the results, I thought everyone wiped standing up. I wonder if any blokes will admit to pissing sitting down? (phantom shits do not count) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jondaken Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 People wipe from back to front? What the... Thats disgusting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
briggaman Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 How can anyone sit and do it?! That really does amaze me. What happens if you get some of the brown stuff on the testes? I'm a stander myself. Also how people wiping back to front?!! That's just wrong.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Rev Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Made me remember this from Viz... Ah, Viz. A favourite at Chateau The_Rev. I think I have had this page out of Viz for about ten years now. Click for big. I imagine Nick Rogers has some of this stuff for his minions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Zen Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I'm a sitter. Didn't even know standing up was an option. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan. Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 I am completely shocked how many sitters we have! I'd never even considered sitting down, you have a toilet getting in your way! Sqautage FTW. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si. Posted May 19, 2009 Share Posted May 19, 2009 Question to you sitters. Have any of you experienced a German toilet, i.e: one that uses "the shelf"? When shitting into such toilets your crap falls onto a shelf mere inches from the place your arse is suspended. It is believed German's use "the shelf" to examine thier crap to ensure it is of uniform size and shape and if not they then adjust their diets accordingly to shit more efficiently. My point being if you are a sitter and were to use the shelf the ods are pretty high that upon dropping your hand down there with the paper for a swipe you will no doubt make hard contact with the shit on the shelf. thoughts? Comments? What The ****? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts