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mjmooney

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Very close with my mom, dad and brother (despite latter two being Dingles).  My Dad is one of 9 so got shed loads of Auntie's, Uncles and Cousins.  (mom is 1 of 4).

My Wife's family is also pretty large.  Friggin' expensive wedding that was!

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Both Nan's still going strong at 89 and 83 respectively.  Was worried the past year when I haven't got to see them as time is precious but pleased I'll get to see both this month.

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Both parents are dead. Died within a year of each other a few years ago. I was close to them but my family has always had a slightly odd relationship with itself, for want of a better way of putting it. We aren't touchy-feely and didn't really do the affection thing. We just got on with things. Perhaps this is more odd as my family didn't really do anything outside of itself - my dad had 2 people you'd call friends but for most of my life one of those he spoke to maybe twice a year and the other was more of a business relationship. My mom had workmates but didn't really engage with them outside of work. As such it was the family and that's it.

My mom came from a very large family but we weren't close with them at all - I don't remember ever having met them and even at her funeral they were on the other side and we didn't speak. The extent of my relationship with them is a few names and a few (tragic) stories.

My dad's family were 'our' extended family. My dad was effectively an only child, he had sibling who died as a baby. My grandad died when my dad was at school still, which meant my only grandparent was my nan, who lived with us and pretty much raised us when my parents were working. As a result we were close with her and her family were who we thought as our family - her sisters were our aunts and their families were our closest relations. Particularly when I was young we'd go on holiday with them, we'd take one aunt on holiday with us to visit the other. That continued after my nan died but since my parents died those relationships have died with them. 

There was some more distant family but the relationships there are lost on me. We had some relatives who sent a Christmas card every year and that's it, another set who came from my some distant step family who turned up at a funeral once and were never seen again, an aunt who died when I was very young but who she was I've no idea, and I met one great grandparent once who died immediately after.

I have older siblings who have their own families and lives. Relationships with them are fine, and I've grown closer to one since our parents have died, while the other I can go months without hearing from. We just aren't that kind of family I guess. 

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Starting to get pissed off with my mum. She doesn’t make enough effort with our kids at all. She hasn’t seen them for 6 weeks and the only times she’s been down to our house this year to see the kids off her own back was for their birthdays. She’s gone months without seeing them in past .If it wasn’t for the fact that I’ve taken the kids up to her place then she would have seen them even less this year . What annoys me is that we live right on the edge of the town centre and she goes down town most Fridays and Saturdays for a drink. It’s literally 10 minutes walk away from the pub she drinks in . Her best mate and her mate treat my mum like shit and I’ve had her on the phone in tears a few times over it. She makes more effort to go and spend time with people that treat her bad and people she says she’s had enough of than she does her grandkids . Time and time again she says she’s coming down but rarely shows up. My lad even commented the other day and asked if she was ill because he hadn’t seen her for a while. 
 

We’ve got a funny relationship anyway and she’s never been very maternal. She works in the week so we don’t expect her to come then but the fact she makes more effort to go out drinking with people that don’t even like her, is the most annoying thing . Just as I’m writing this post she’s just rang me up to say she can’t make it today as she’s got up late. Was meant to be coming Thursday but she was too tired from work, then it was Saturday but she went out, then she rang last night and said today. She’s just rang to say she’s only just got up. She just can’t be arsed unless it involves going to the pub. It’s the same with birthdays and Xmas presents. She would always transfer money to my missus for her to buy them. This year my missus said look can you buy them and wrap them because I’ve got enough presents to wrap and it’s too much. So instead of my mum buying and wrapping presents, she just gave them money in card because she couldn’t be arsed to buy and wrap anything . Don’t really want to say anything to her, but it’s pissing us off a bit . If you can’t be arsed to make effort, fine, but don’t expect us to make any and once kids get older they will realise. You get back what you put in as they say. 

Edited by Rugeley Villa
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4 minutes ago, Rugeley Villa said:

Starting to get pissed off with my mum. She doesn’t make enough effort with our kids at all. She hasn’t seen them for 6 weeks and the only times she’s been down to our house this year to see the kids off her own back was for their birthdays. She’s gone months without seeing them in past .If it wasn’t for the fact that I’ve taken the kids up to her place then she would have seen them even less this year . What annoys me is that we live right on the edge of the town centre and she goes down town most Fridays and Saturdays for a drink. It’s literally 10 minutes walk away from the pub she drinks in . Her best mate and her mate treat my mum like shit and I’ve had her on the phone in tears a few times over it. She makes more effort to go and spend time with people that treat her bad and people she says she’s had enough of than she does her grandkids . Time and time again she says she’s coming down but rarely shows up. My lad even commented the other day and asked if she was ill because he hadn’t seen her for a while. 
 

We’ve got a funny relationship anyway and she’s never been very maternal. She works in the week so we don’t expect her to come then but the fact she makes more effort to go out drinking with people that don’t even like her, is the most annoying thing . Just as I’m writing this post she’s just rang me up to say she can’t make it today as she’s got up late. Was meant to be coming Thursday but she was too tired from work, then it was Saturday but she went out, then she rang last night and said today. She’s just rang to say she’s only just got up. She just can’t be arsed unless it involves going to the pub. It’s the same with birthdays and Xmas presents. She would always transfer money to my missus for her to buy them. This year my missus said look can you buy them and wrap them because I’ve got enough presents to wrap and it’s too much. So instead of my mum buying and wrapping presents, she just gave them money in card because she couldn’t be arsed to buy and wrap anything . Don’t really want to say anything to her, but it’s pissing us off a bit . If you can’t be arsed to make effort, fine, but don’t expect us to make any and once kids get older they will realise. You get back what you put in as they say. 

Only just got up, at 2.30pm??? How old is she? I'm guessing 58-60+. Not really the way to act at that age I suppose.

Fell out with my family back in the 90's as they pissed me off. Didn't see or speak to them for nearly 12 years.

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1 minute ago, rjw63 said:

Only just got up, at 2.30pm??? How old is she? I'm guessing 58-60+. Not really the way to act at that age I suppose.

Fell out with my family back in the 90's as they pissed me off. Didn't see or speak to them for nearly 12 years.

She’s 57 . I don’t think she’s just got up, probably got up around 12. Either way still enough hours in the day to make the effort with the grandkids you supposedly adore, no ? When she’s going out on the piss she’s up at 9 latest. She doesn’t work Fridays. If she’s not working or not going pub she lays in bed late and is in pjs all day most of the time. Next time she rings me up crying about her mate treating her bad, I’ll just tell her I’m not interested anymore. I told her 18 months ago to get rid of her out of her life. We ain’t a close family . I struggle to feel how I should about my mum regarding the love a son should have for his mum. Funny relationship which stems from my childhood and also her childhood. 

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We're off on a family holiday (Whitby) next week - me and the missus, both daughters and their fellers, all three grandchildren. Looking forward to it... I think.  🤔

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50 minutes ago, mjmooney said:

We're off on a family holiday (Whitby) next week - me and the missus, both daughters and their fellers, all three grandchildren. Looking forward to it... I think.  🤔

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11 minutes ago, chrisp65 said:

I hear Whitby can be nice n quiet around the last summer bank holiday…

Some friends went last week, said it was rammed. 

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Just now, mjmooney said:

Some friends went last week, said it was rammed. 

It was somewhere we’ve fancied for a while, and when I looked it up, it appeared there are times of the year when it is almost literally gridlocked with pedestrians.

I’d think you’re best hope, is probably continued indifferent weather.

That weather we’re enjoying today, it’s dry but breezy and people are complaining there’s no summer, whilst sat outside in tee shirts. Keeps the people away that think nice day means blue sky and 27 C. What do they do for 11 months and 3 weeks?

 

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2 hours ago, Rugeley Villa said:

Starting to get pissed off with my mum.

I have to tread a careful line with my mum.

Her background wasn’t great and I give her massive massive credit for how she’s come out of it. But there are a couple of traits there that still show now and again. She can try and be the family matriarch and try and be in charge a bit too much. But the main thing is visits, she will comment if I haven’t visited for a while, and I always respond by mentioning it’s exactly the same distance to my house from hers, as it is from hers to mine. Except I’m working all week, and she isn’t.

 

 

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If anyone has ever watched a series called shameless, that’s my family. 
 

Ive often thought about DNA testing because I’m convinced I must be the milkman’s 

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23 hours ago, chrisp65 said:

It’s exactly the same distance to my house from hers, as it is from hers to mine.

That is a remarkable coincidence. 

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