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When i was in.school there was the popular crowd which i wasnt really part of but i made friends with some of them to remain kool and never experience the bullying that thwy use to inflict.

I had groups of friends that i stayed loyal to and to this day we are still as close. All the popular/bullies aint friends with each other and most of them are have become either overweight and look 20 years older or in prison

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I was bullied a lot through primary and secondary school. It affected my mental health and ruined a lot of my teenage years. Many of the memories folks have shared on here are very familiar - hiding in the back of the car when out shopping with my parents etc. I eventually moved schools to get away from it. But it made me very insecure and paranoid for many years - there's even still a bit in there when I'm in a new situation.

Over here in the US the schools seem to be aware of it and try to teach kids to be supportive of each other but you never know. I've thought about what I would do if someone ends up bullying my son when he goes to school. I honestly have had thoughts that I'd threaten the other kid to scare the shit out of him as I know first hand what a negative effect bullying can have. 

 

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On 08/02/2021 at 13:29, Genie said:

One of my biggest fears as a father is that my kids might be bullied.

 

What would you do? If a group of kids sets upon your son/daughter. Not physically, but they decide they just want to be a-holes and psychologically bully them? 

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2 hours ago, TheAuthority said:

What would you do? If a group of kids sets upon your son/daughter. Not physically, but they decide they just want to be a-holes and psychologically bully them? 

I really don’t know. I’d probably try and take it head on, confront them about it. Most bullies are cowards and would hate that. 

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Me and a friend once got pulled into the head of years office for bullying. She was actually my English teacher and had taught my mum so she actually began with “I don’t think you are but it’s important you understand how others feel” We were year 8.

The previous weekend the dad of the lad we were “bullying” actually came over the house to speak to my dad and we both shook hands.

Now this lad came from a well known family in the area I just happen to have a massive group of friends. 
 

As far as I remember there were no interactions that I would class as bullying. I suppose bullying could be classed as however it ends up making the recipient feel regardless whether it’s not out of the ordinary behaviour.

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11 hours ago, TheAuthority said:

What would you do? If a group of kids sets upon your son/daughter. Not physically, but they decide they just want to be a-holes and psychologically bully them? 

Honestly? 

If you go and yell at them and threaten then (I'm guessing you're not talking about 10 years olds here, but teenagers), then they'd probably just turn around and laugh at you, or they definitely would as soon as you're out of sight.  It also makes you look like a dipshit to most kids. 

I'd talk to them, see what the issue is.  Maybe your kid started it?  Get the story.  If they're not gonna co-operate, just say something along the lines of "I can't let this issue carry on, it's not good for my kid, and long term, it's not good for you - what can we do to stop it?" 

Engage them.

MOST KIDS - will engage back.  Only the kids with the biggest problems won't and there's not much you'll be able to about it.

I think a lot of parents are quick to point the finger at others (when their kids are young), kids are the biggest cheaters/liars and take anything young'uns say with a pinch of salt. 

As the kids get older, it's all about engagement.  Take the power back, don't give it.  

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14 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

Honestly? 

If you go and yell at them and threaten then (I'm guessing you're not talking about 10 years olds here, but teenagers), then they'd probably just turn around and laugh at you, or they definitely would as soon as you're out of sight.  It also makes you look like a dipshit to most kids. 

I'd talk to them, see what the issue is.  Maybe your kid started it?  Get the story.  If they're not gonna co-operate, just say something along the lines of "I can't let this issue carry on, it's not good for my kid, and long term, it's not good for you - what can we do to stop it?" 

Engage them.

MOST KIDS - will engage back.  Only the kids with the biggest problems won't and there's not much you'll be able to about it.

I think a lot of parents are quick to point the finger at others (when their kids are young), kids are the biggest cheaters/liars and take anything young'uns say with a pinch of salt. 

As the kids get older, it's all about engagement.  Take the power back, don't give it.  

Or kick them til they piss blood.

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My 6 year old got bullied on Roblox! I’ve had to ban her from playing it now. I guess I probably shouldn’t have let her start playing it in the first place .
 

I think learning a Martial art is good. Teaches kids confidence and they can also look after themselves if ever get bullied in a physical way. Can’t wait for my daughter to restart it again.

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  • 1 year later...
4 minutes ago, useless said:

When I was at school I used to stand at one end of the playground and then run to the other end wait a while and before doing it again, not sure what that's got to do with anything but one day a group of my fellow classmates took me aside and taught me karate, and as far as I was aware after that I knew karate, I remember telling people at home and how easy it is to learn, it gave me some confidence. In a strange way it wasn't until years later that it dawned on me that I didn't know karate at all.

It's like when you grow up a bit, you think you can fight and handle yourself, got all the confidence in your 20s, even give that loud mouth lad in the pub a couple of diggs, an now he's your pal. Then you get yourself in a situation, give it large, but this time you get the slap first. Unless you really know some styles, or can just handle yourself, that confidence can disappear in a instant and you can end up in alot of trouble, not even able defending yourself.

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I would have been about eight or nine at the time, it wasn't as if I was going around looking for fights, I've never been in a fight in my life, I think it probably just gave me some confidence just for the fact that being able to say I could do karate probably seemed like a cool thing at the time.

When I say I didn't realize until I was older it wasn't as if I was going around the whole time with a swagger because I knew karate, after a while I'd completely forgotten about it, but when I reremembered when older that's when it dawned on me that I hadn't known karate; apart from my inital 'lessons', I can't even ever remember using it other than to demonstrate a karate chop to a relative of mine, I think it was basically just a psychological thing.

Perhaps I should say I don't count being taught karate by some of the other children as bullying, as I'm pretty sure they thought that they genuinely knew karate and thought that they were genuinely teaching me.

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I was lucky in that I was never really bullied at secondary school. I was good friends with one of the cooler kids in the year. We'd known each other since junior school and that saved me I reckon. 

 

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Wasn't bullied as such as I was a bigger kid and reasonably nice but on a couple of occasions got into fisticuffs and mashed a couple of dicks. 

Didn't really cop a hiding til after leaving school. Mixture of too much booze and a bit of arrogance. 

Still, if you give it you gotta take it. I did both. 

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6 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

alert-siren.gif

 

 

 

I'm no punch up artist I can assure you.

Although when riled I have been known to brandish a baseball bat or the likes. With excellent results.

That's what living on Chelmsley Wood was like, thankfully that is all behind me now.

Seriously, getting away from there is the best thing I have ever done apart from marrying my second wife.

Yeah I know, gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay :)

 

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I've always stuck up for the underdog. I was never bullied. But my first year in junior high I was a dick to a few kids a few times because I probably felt threatened by them somehow. Pure jungle instinct stuff. Acting tough to try to establish dominance, I suppose. It was just that one year. I'm still ashamed about it all these years later.

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