fruitvilla Posted April 3, 2021 Share Posted April 3, 2021 On 02/04/2021 at 00:46, Stevo985 said: How do non-binary samurai kill people? They/Them I didn't get it ... but to be fair I got stuck at stroking. Had to look up the cheddar one too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted April 3, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 3, 2021 3 minutes ago, fruitvilla said: I got stuck at stroking 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
choffer Posted April 6, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 6, 2021 On 03/04/2021 at 16:30, imavillan said: Just thought i'd let you all know i failed my ventriloquists exam yesterday. Can't say i'm surprised. I know I'm re-posting one of my own here but I got a like for it today which was odd, given I don't ever remember hearing the joke before, let alone remember posting it. On 11/02/2019 at 15:49, choffer said: I've made a ventriloquist dummy out of some old carpet. It's ruggish. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Salad Posted April 6, 2021 Share Posted April 6, 2021 Just went to see a faith healer perform. He was so bad even a guy in a wheelchair got up and walked out. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post BOF Posted April 12, 2021 Moderator Popular Post Share Posted April 12, 2021 5 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paddywhack Posted April 12, 2021 Share Posted April 12, 2021 (edited) 11 minutes ago, BOF said: Rachel Weisz in the mummy Edited April 12, 2021 by Paddywhack 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Big Salad Posted April 13, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted April 13, 2021 My wife informed me this morning she is leaving me, she screamed “I can think of 14 things I hate about you.” Then as she left the room she shouts “oh yeah, I also hate your complete obsession with tennis.” I replied, “That’s 15, love.” 6 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted April 13, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 13, 2021 1 hour ago, Big Salad said: My wife informed me this morning she is leaving me, she screamed “I can think of 14 things I hate about you.” Then as she left the room she shouts “oh yeah, I also hate your complete obsession with tennis.” I replied, “That’s 15, love.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bickster Posted April 13, 2021 Moderator Share Posted April 13, 2021 Scouse graffiti (Yer Ma has been a Scouse joke meme since forever) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vive_La_Villa Posted April 14, 2021 Share Posted April 14, 2021 On 06/04/2021 at 14:17, Big Salad said: Just went to see a faith healer perform. He was so bad even a guy in a wheelchair got up and walked out. I can’t believe this has no likes! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted April 14, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 14, 2021 On 13/04/2021 at 11:23, Big Salad said: My wife informed me this morning she is leaving me, she screamed “I can think of 14 things I hate about you.” Then as she left the room she shouts “oh yeah, I also hate your complete obsession with tennis.” I replied, “That’s 15, love.” On 13/04/2021 at 12:30, sidcow said: Wow, that's me shown! 5 likes and 5 smileys. I'm THAT guy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Robtaylor200 Posted April 22, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted April 22, 2021 other thread was talking about Vinyl verses Alexa In a second hand shop the other day I was going through some old Vinyl and came across an album of wasp noises, took it home to play it and it was just buzzing Turns out I was playing the B side 1 1 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted April 22, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 22, 2021 8 hours ago, Robtaylor200 said: other thread was talking about Vinyl verses Alexa In a second hand shop the other day I was going through some old Vinyl and came across an album of wasp noises, took it home to play it and it was just buzzing Turns out I was playing the B side Weirdly, immediately after reading the above joke, a friend of mine posted on FB that he was genuinely listening to (and enjoying) this album: 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post rjw63 Posted April 23, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted April 23, 2021 An Irish businessman staying at the Ritz hotel in London takes a card, offering sexual services from a phone box. Back at the hotel he rings the number. A lady with a silky soft voice asks if she can be of any help. The man says "I'd like a blow job, a straight shag, then doggie style, mild bondage, a few minutes of anal and finish with a tit wank. Is that okay?" The lady replies "Sounds fun sir, but you might like to dial 9 for an outside line first" 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted April 23, 2021 Share Posted April 23, 2021 The abominable snowman gets called all sorts of names, yeti doesn't seem to mind. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted April 23, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 23, 2021 2 hours ago, rjw63 said: The abominable snowman gets called all sorts of names, yeti doesn't seem to mind. I can't see what is filthy about this joke. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Salad Posted April 24, 2021 Share Posted April 24, 2021 My Mrs has been having a go at me lately saying I’ve become obsessed with becoming a detective and not spending time with her. This morning she said “ I think we should split up” I said “good idea, we’ll cover more ground that way” 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted April 25, 2021 Share Posted April 25, 2021 Delighted to say I have a new job fitting mirrors Nothing fancy but it was always something I could see myself doing 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mottaloo Posted April 29, 2021 Share Posted April 29, 2021 My mate told me that he had failed his aboriginal music exam. I replied "Didya redo it ?" 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted April 29, 2021 VT Supporter Share Posted April 29, 2021 On 21/12/2020 at 16:26, Big Salad said: My friend was telling me that he failed his exam in Aboriginal music. I said, "Didja redo it?" 5 hours ago, mottaloo said: My mate told me that he had failed his aboriginal music exam. I replied "Didya redo it ?" Ex Villa defender with large refuse container. 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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