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JohnCresswell

WAHEY! It's a JOKE thread : Enter at your own risk.

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Who's the next coolest guy after the Hip replacement guy?

 

The Gynaecologist.

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH LAUGH AT MY JOKE YOU MONKEYS.

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Don't worry it's now gone : )

 

In terms of being the kind of joke that is just good enough to leave some doubt as to whether or not it's deliberately bad I thought it had elements of genius.

 

I really, REALLY hope that was the idea.

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So this old Jewish couple in their seventies are still having regular sex, but the old lady finds that although she's enjoying it, the earth no longer moves.

 

They consult their rabbi who tells them that the only way he knows to fix the problem is for them to ask a handsome young 19 year old lad to wave a towel by their bedside while they're at it.

 

They duly engage the services of a suitable young man, and with everything set they engage in lovemaking, with the young man steadily waving the towel by the bedside.

 

After a while the old lady decides that nothing is going to happen. So between the three of them they agree that the only way is for the two men to swap roles. This done, the activities resume, with spectacular results.

 

The old boy turns to the young bloke with a wink, and says "Now THAT'S how you wave a towel."

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The Tories are going to stop benefits for alcoholics, drug addicts and the obese.

In other words, Scottish Independence by the back door.

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Grandma's last words were, "Will you pull the...."

So I pulled the plug and then she was gone.

Sometimes I wonder if she was going to say, "curtains."

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When my 15 year old said that the stain on her dress was 'Johnson's Baby lotion', I didn't think anything of it at the time, officer.


 

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Johnson's boast 'No More Tears'

Let's find out in the showers,

Love Big Dave, Cell 4 E Wing


 

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Eighty percent of child abuse cases are by someone the child knows while only twenty percent are committed by strangers.

I always let my children talk to strangers. Keeps them safer

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The dead bodies in the morgue are cooler

Wrong thread?

#rattlerattlejewelleryjewellery

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One for rob

What's the difference between Chelsea and sasha gray? Sasha gray can handle 10 men at home

 

Only problem with this joke is that, in the Sasha Grey scenario, surely all 10 men score?

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Police arrest 2 teenagers.

One is drinking battery acid the other is eating fireworks.

They charge 1 and let the other one off.

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