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Things of the decade


dAVe80

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Wild card.

My oldest son has been turned into an eco warrior/vegan by his girlfriend.

He used to be full of fun, she has sucked all the life out of him and made him Mr Serious.

They came on holiday with us to Barbados. She kept stopping him from drinking, and insisted on going to bed at 9.30pm. The rest of the family now can't stand her.

What's happened to him makes me very sad.

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3 hours ago, bickster said:

Oh has anyone done the pedantic thing of pointing out that the decade has another year to run yet?

Hold on...is that the official way of measuring it?
 

Makes so much more sense to me that the decade starts when the 3rd character changes so 2010-2019, 2020-2029 otherwise the 2020s don’t even include 2020. Madness and I want nothing to do with it.

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49 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

Wild card.

My oldest son has been turned into an eco warrior/vegan by his girlfriend.

He used to be full of fun, she has sucked all the life out of him and made him Mr Serious.

They came on holiday with us to Barbados. She kept stopping him from drinking, and insisted on going to bed at 9.30pm. The rest of the family now can't stand her.

What's happened to him makes me very sad.

Seen it happen to friends, would hate to see a drastic change happen to my daughter. 

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5 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

She kept stopping him from drinking, and insisted on going to bed at 9.30pm.

Look on the dark side.

Stay up and get pissed with you, or get blunted, smoke rocks and bang like rabbits, gradually consuming the drugs that have been offered to them on the beach in the day, in the Caribbean, staging post for the South American narcotics trade?

;) 

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1 hour ago, Xann said:

Look on the dark side.

Stay up and get pissed with you, or get blunted, smoke rocks and bang like rabbits, gradually consuming the drugs that have been offered to them on the beach in the day, in the Caribbean, staging post for the South American narcotics trade?

;) 

They'd already smoked their blunts.

Apparently this was the last long-haul flight they'll be taking, Greta's orders.

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10 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

 

Apparently this was the last long-haul flight they'll be taking, Greta's orders.

Fair play to them.

The older folk don't like it, but ultimately you've left a right **** mess for the following generations to sort out.

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1 minute ago, Davkaus said:

Fair play to them.

The older folk don't like it, but ultimately you've left a right **** mess for the following generations to sort out.

Yes fair play to them, they just got the ferry to France. I wonder what fuel it uses?

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4 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

Yes fair play to them, they just got the ferry to France. I wonder what fuel it uses?

Not ideal, but they're at least trying to minimise their impact. There's a whole world of grey between clubbing baby seals and becoming a monk.

 

 

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2 hours ago, rjw63 said:

Wild card.

My oldest son has been turned into an eco warrior/vegan by his girlfriend.

He used to be full of fun, she has sucked all the life out of him and made him Mr Serious.

They came on holiday with us to Barbados. She kept stopping him from drinking, and insisted on going to bed at 9.30pm. The rest of the family now can't stand her.

What's happened to him makes me very sad.

Hopefully he'll realise soon enough that he's a shadow of his former self. 

I've seen it happen to mates and its horrible. Eventually they get out of it and get back to being themselves. 

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1 minute ago, Davkaus said:

Not ideal, but they're at least trying to minimise their impact. There's a whole world of grey between clubbing baby seals and becoming a monk.

 

 

The point of this is a family member is alienating himself and he can't see it. He's had his spine removed and the fun part of his character banished.

Don't no why I bothered putting it here, some of you lot have yet to experience this shit but all seem like experts.

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2 hours ago, rjw63 said:

Wild card.

My oldest son has been turned into an eco warrior/vegan by his girlfriend.

He used to be full of fun, she has sucked all the life out of him and made him Mr Serious.

They came on holiday with us to Barbados. She kept stopping him from drinking, and insisted on going to bed at 9.30pm. The rest of the family now can't stand her.

What's happened to him makes me very sad.

Knowing you as much as i can on here, i think you should exercise some good old fashioned rjw63 advice to your boy. You've seen Life, had fun and no doubt more than the odd rocky period but you've cracked on with it and appear happy enough. 

Tell your boy how much you and your family/friends have noticed the change in him and not for the better. Perhaps he already knows it himself and this might give him a nudge in to doing more fun stuff like he used to ?

Ok, i realise anything you might say could cause an almighty shitestorm but he's your boy, not someone else's nipper. It would rip me apart to see such a dip in personality if i had a son/daughter.

I know it's easy for me to tell you what you should do or say but i remember you mentioning her before and back then even your much valued DHUTWU solution wouldn't have worked.

I feel for ya, mate

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3 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

The point of this is a family member is alienating himself and he can't see it. He's had his spine removed and the fun part of his character banished.

Don't no why I bothered putting it here, some of you lot have yet to experience this shit but all seem like experts.

Fair does, obviously you seem him day to day and see the other changes as well. I'm just making some similar decisions and think you can still may some sacrifices without turning in to a complete shadow of your self. We're cutting back on flights and some other stuff I'm sure you think makes us annoying eco-warriors, but still see mates/family all the time and still go out on the lash fairly often, but clearly the stuff I was replying to isn't the full picture. Sounds like she's gone full Yoko and the environmentalism bit isn't your main beef.

Just trying to give another perspective as I'm guessing I'm fairly similar in age and some opinions to your lad, not trying to piss on your chips :) 

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6 minutes ago, Davkaus said:

Fair does, obviously you seem him day to day and see the other changes as well. I'm just making some similar decisions and think you can still may some sacrifices without turning in to a complete shadow of your self. We're cutting back on flights and some other stuff I'm sure you think makes us annoying eco-warriors, but still see mates/family all the time and still go out on the lash fairly often, but clearly the stuff I was replying to isn't the full picture. Sounds like she's gone full Yoko and the environmentalism bit isn't your main beef.

Just trying to give another perspective as I'm guessing I'm fairly similar in age and some opinions to your lad, not trying to piss on your chips :) 

Furry muff.

The enviro-stuff is a cause because she's brainwashed the gullible tit :)

But like everyone, they are hypocritical to some degree.

They've got a car each and neither of them are electric, but she in particular is very preachy. I'll shut up now it must be boring.

I'll go to the "piss you off thread" and moan about fireworks already going off (at 3.00pm).

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But do you think he's unhappy? 

That's the main thing 

I think the main thing for me this decade was realising how unhappy I was with "normal", stuff like gigs, football, weekend drinking, eating shit etc work, mainly just myself and the person I had lazily become, there were several traits in my character which others liked but I didn't 

2018 I cancelled my wedding, left my partner after 16 years, lost 3 stone, moved to Germany

I live a very different life, shocked a lot of people, absolutely love it and other than breaking some hearts wouldn't change a thing 

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35 minutes ago, villa4europe said:

But do you think he's unhappy? 

That's the main thing 

I think the main thing for me this decade was realising how unhappy I was with "normal", stuff like gigs, football, weekend drinking, eating shit etc work, mainly just myself and the person I had lazily become, there were several traits in my character which others liked but I didn't 

2018 I cancelled my wedding, left my partner after 16 years, lost 3 stone, moved to Germany

I live a very different life, shocked a lot of people, absolutely love it and other than breaking some hearts wouldn't change a thing 

Probably not...but he certainly doesn't LOOK happy like he used to. When she shouted (and I mean shouted) across a church car park in Barbados "YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T HAVING ANY MORE RUM PUNCH" when on an island tour (BTW Teds Tours, great stuff) even people we didn't know looked at him and looked sad :(

BTW this is not a fling, they just got a house together, unfortunately.

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6 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

... you lot have yet to experience this shit but all seem like experts.

This is VT, on the internet.

© America comes here for medical advice

Of course we know best.

 

So you're worried there's a white sheep in the family?  :detect:

Not smack, alcohol abuse, mental illness, a criminal record as long as your arm or horrendous sexual deviance?

From the details you've afforded us it could be construed that you've been a good parent?  Your continued concern could also be indicative of that?

You seem upset that you did it unwittingly :)  

 

Everyone's brainwashed. His flavour is just different from yours.

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42 minutes ago, villa4europe said:

But do you think he's unhappy? 

That's the main thing 

I think the main thing for me this decade was realising how unhappy I was with "normal", stuff like gigs, football, weekend drinking, eating shit etc work, mainly just myself and the person I had lazily become, there were several traits in my character which others liked but I didn't 

2018 I cancelled my wedding, left my partner after 16 years, lost 3 stone, moved to Germany

I live a very different life, shocked a lot of people, absolutely love it and other than breaking some hearts wouldn't change a thing 

Yep, the old "you've changed" can be a wake up call to someone who's losing their way, but it can also be a controlling thing, where you're not giving someone space to evolve as a person.

If someone is displaying symptoms of severe mental health problems or taking loads of hard drugs, then by all means intervene, but a few philosophical disagreements are normal, surely? No reason to lose a friend or family member over.

P.S. @rjw63 it's your son, and you know best. We can only offer our own experiences of situations that might be relevant or might not. From my perspective, having drifted down some very weird / stupid / unpleasant paths at different points in my life, I am eternally grateful to the people who disagreed with what I was doing, but stuck by me in a non-judgmental way.

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Just now, Xann said:

This is VT, on the internet.

© America comes here for medical advice

Of course we know best.

 

So you're worried there's a white sheep in the family?  :detect:

Not smack, alcohol abuse, mental illness, a criminal record as long as your arm or horrendous sexual deviance?

From the details you've afforded us it could be construed that you've been a good parent?  Your continued concern could also be indicative of that?

You seem upset that you did it unwittingly :)  

 

Everyone's brainwashed. His flavour is just different from yours.

Unfortunately that list sounds like me ;)

Yeah I did OK with the kids.

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19 hours ago, Seat68 said:

Years ago you posted about the trials and tribulations of Barry Town, the beginning of the new era I recall. Bloody interesting stuff. Probably archived now at must have been 10 years ago. 

Non Villa football schizz...

Spoiler

2013 the club was closed by the then owner, he just phoned up the FA 3 games before the end of the season and said we were done, closed. The FAW simply accepted that and cancelled the last three games and took our name off the league table. Done. Finished.

A group of about 30 of us sat in the stand, with the Manager and decided we wouldn’t allow it. With some very good contacts, some great advice from Alun Cairns MP and the free work of a specialist sports Barrister (Jonathan Crystal) who normally works for the likes of Everton, West Ham, Frank Warren etc. We took the FA to court and wiped the floor with them. 

We did a deal with the local council that were failing in their sports provision, we now have boy, girl, male, female, able and disabled teams and veteran teams, literally hundreds of players on the books. The club covers sport provision, the council give us a ‘competitive’ rent on the Ground.

2019 our physio went to the Japan World Cup as part of the England squad. Sold a player to an english league team. We’ve had players in the Wales football C (amateur) international team. Qualified for the Europa League (home draw, away defeat). Last night with two games to spare, made the top 6 cut for 2nd half of the season. meaning second half of the season we cannot be relegated but could get another European gig, currently 1 place and 4 points off that European spot.

We’re still learning, still making mistakes. My job and travel means I currently do absolutely nothing beyond turn up and shout weird shit at opposition players and fans. But I still have a voting share, so I tell people I own a football club. It’s quite the handy argument closer when other clubs fans try to say their club is bigger or better in some way, we just point out we actually own ours.

Yma O Hyd, We’re Still Here. 

 

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8 minutes ago, rjw63 said:

Probably not...but he certainly doesn't LOOK happy like he used to. When she shouted (and I mean shouted) across a church car park in Barbados "YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T HAVING ANY MORE RUM PUNCH" when on an island tour (BTW Teds Tours, great stuff) even people we didn't know looked at him and looked sad :(

BTW this is not a fling, they just got a house together, unfortunately.

My advice would be to give him an exhaust

Find a way to give him a night off, you and him, drag him back in to his old ways, not necessarily to see where his heart / head lies but because deep down he's still got it in him, you'll then know his happiness 

Drink is the big one, I don't do it anymore either whereas in England I was getting smashed every weekend for the sake of it (and not really enjoying it) my missus doesn't like me drinking and controls it, it's a bit shit at times but then at others I'm grateful for it, and then sometimes she goes away for the night so I go to the local sports bar alone to watch villa vs spurs forget how strong German beer is, get in a taxi across town with some stranger to an Irish bar that he reckons is good but I don't know where it is, try to drink all their gin, smash my week old phone, fall asleep in the doorway of a shop, get woken up by a passer by and get a taxi home... :ph34r:

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