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Half Siblings


maqroll
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I've got 3, 2 sisters 1 brother from my dads second marriage, all a lot younger than me

there's obviously a difference there from my brother from my mom and dad but I never use step or half or any of that nonsense, they're my brother and sisters, confuses more people than it should, a lot of my friends who haven't got divorced parents don't get it

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Can we extend this to family dynamics generally? I'm an only child, married to someone who is one of five, and I am convinced that the difference in family backgrounds is THE major factor in influencing the way we interact. 

Edited by mjmooney
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7 minutes ago, mjmooney said:

Can we extend this to family dynamics generally? I'm an only child, married to someone who is one of five, and I am convinced that the difference in family backgrounds is THE major factor in influencing the way we interact. 

I'd go along with that Mike.  I have a small family, whereas my wife is the second youngest child (including half sisters and brothers) of eight.  Hence her family gatherings are always enormous, and sometimes a bit overwhelming.

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41 minutes ago, mjmooney said:

Can we extend this to family dynamics generally? I'm an only child, married to someone who is one of five, and I am convinced that the difference in family backgrounds is THE major factor in influencing the way we interact. 

Absolutely. A "family" thread is probably long overdue. Why do you think your family backgrounds are the major factor in how we interact?

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2 hours ago, Risso said:

I'd go along with that Mike.  I have a small family, whereas my wife is the second youngest child (including half sisters and brothers) of eight.  Hence her family gatherings are always enormous, and sometimes a bit overwhelming.

Same for me.. I'm an only child, my Mom was an only child and my Dad is now (he had a heavily disabled brother who died when my Dad was 18). As such I've never been exposed to family gatherings but when I've dated girls with big families, I find the get-togethers overwhelming and I can't say I enjoy them in the slightest. Always looking for excuses not to attend! I've been called miserable and a loner but its not that, I just don't enjoy things like that! 

 

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2 hours ago, maqroll said:

Absolutely. A "family" thread is probably long overdue. Why do you think your family backgrounds are the major factor in how we interact?

When I said "we" I meant me and Mrs. M specifically. Lots of little things. She hates being alone, I don't mind it. She likes to share everything (e.g. food), I'm more "That's yours, this is mine". She hates it if I have hobbies that she doesn't, and often accuses me of being selfish (possibly with some justification). I'm sure it's down to our childhoods. She was never alone, I often was, and I didn't mind it at all, I liked having my own space. 

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One sibling here and I absolutely love my brother, we share the same interests in sports and working profession and when we are together it's great fun. But we have never been really close. 6 years between us plays a part. We never went to the same school, when I moved out he was 13, when he started working after school, I moved south by 400 miles. He had his first kid when mine where 15. I'd say we are more like cousins. It's a bit strange. Total opposite to my missus who is more or less attached to her sister at the hip.

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I am the middle child in my family (older brother, younger sister. They both have learning difficulties as does my mum. My sister had her son taken off her due to issues with violence and anger and my wife and I are special guardians (similar to adoption) for him. Because of this I no longer see my family but contact my brother occasionally. 

My wife is the youngest of 3 girls but her family are not as close as they used to be as her dad is quite domineering. I don't really do the family thing but love my wife and son to bits. 

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1 hour ago, Xela said:

Same for me.. I'm an only child, my Mom was an only child and my Dad is now (he had a heavily disabled brother who died when my Dad was 18). As such I've never been exposed to family gatherings but when I've dated girls with big families, I find the get-togethers overwhelming and I can't say I enjoy them in the slightest. Always looking for excuses not to attend! I've been called miserable and a loner but its not that, I just don't enjoy things like that! 

 

I must have a million cousins, but by and large I don't really know many of them very well, even some first cousins. The routine nature of family events is kind of a bummer. Like everyone's just pretending to be honest about making the effort to stay more in touch and whatnot. 

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I may have mentioned this before, but a few years ago a random woman contacted me on Facebook to inform me that she is my long lost half sister as a result of my dad getting her mum pregnant when he was about 20 and working for Midland Red buses.  True to my general luck, she turned out to be a Bluenose.  We haven't kept in touch, not because of that, but because you can't suddenly recapture history after 40 years.

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Which of course has just reminded me of the fact that for a number of years, every time I went for a piss at work I used to think about Risso's dad. 

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When I was little people were always telling me what a pity it was that I had no brothers or sisters. But all my friends seemed to hate their siblings, and fight with them all the time. **** that - I had my own room, and peace and quiet. I did like the fact that most of my mates had younger sisters who seemed to like me. :)

But I never really understood the sibling thing, and when we had a second kid I was worried that they would be constantly squabbling. Luckily they (both girls, two years apart) get on brilliantly, they've always been best mates. 

Oddly enough, my wife just lost her older brother yesterday - same age as me, but virtually a down and out, died of COPD/heart attack after a lifetime of heavy smoking and drinking, plus mental health issues. She feels guilty that it's almost a relief (they never got on anyway). 

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