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What is your experience of mental health?


AstonMartyn88

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On 26/04/2021 at 22:15, Chindie said:

I suppose I should do an update.

I'm still not great. At the moment I'm basically trying to get myself out of a spiral of self neglect, if nothing else because this year in lockdown has seen me get horrifyingly fat and I'm due to be back in the office in a couple of months. I'm trying to be 'good' and I spent the weekend markedly cutting back on calories, but then today I finish work and just get a pizza.

My house is a state, as well as myself. There's crap everywhere, I've not vacuumed in months... I just can't be arsed. And that's going for everything really. It just all seems pointless.

After finishing work today, which wasn't a particularly bad day, I just sat down and watched TV and browsed my usual online haunts. There's stuff I could be doing, stuff I want to do in my hobbies, but I can't get motivated for it. I did some hobby work over the weekend, and the current project I'm focused on (of about 6) still got a fair bit too do, but after the work day ends I just can't be bothered at the moment.

I dunno what's wrong with me. I still think about topping myself more than I should.

Sorry to hear this and I may have asked before but have you ever tried medication?  I’ve tried to come off it this year and I’m reaching lows by the day.  I haven’t restarted yet for some other personal reasons but it’s almost keeping me going know I will soon be out this living nightmare I feel like I’m in.
 

I find myself googling about suicide a lot and when this starts happening I knows medication is the only way.  It doesn’t make everything great, but it makes life bearable at least.

Edited by Vive_La_Villa
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For anyone struggling, I highly recommend reading A New Earth and The Power of Now by Eckart Tolle. Or if you're into audiobooks more, listen to Awakening by Anthony De Mello. Life changing stuff if you go in with an open mind. You really are not your thoughts.

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Struggling recently. 

Lockdown, working from home, partner having a tough time at work, living with my partner's parents, injured so can't play football or squash, barely leaving the house.

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10 hours ago, Mandy Lifeboats said:

If a brain is ill you should not let it make big decisions. That’s like running a marathon on a broken leg and then being surprised that it hurts more.   The worse your condition gets the worse decisions you make and the more stress you cause yourself.  That leads to a downward spiral.  
 

Death is permanent.  Mental Illness might not be.  Get help.    

Restarted the meds. 
 

7 hours ago, MCU said:

For anyone struggling, I highly recommend reading A New Earth and The Power of Now by Eckart Tolle. Or if you're into audiobooks more, listen to Awakening by Anthony De Mello. Life changing stuff if you go in with an open mind. You really are not your thoughts.

Tried this and also stuff from Dr Joe Dispenza. It all makes sense but feels impossible to put in to practise. 

Edited by Vive_La_Villa
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It's weird how it helps talking about it though. I had a really shit time cause of some unresolved stuff that just caused havoc on every single relationship I had, professionally and in private. Actually visiting a professional just for a few sessions to get stuff off your chest was massive. I basically got reset by it. 

The amount of stuff you are taught to never complain about, talk about or share can become a complete bastard to carry.

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On 28/04/2021 at 13:34, wazzap24 said:

Being in debt isn’t a small matter. It can be hugely debilitating and take a massive toll on both physical and mental health. 

I’ve been there. 4/5 years ago I had close to £50k on credit cards. I only got out of it through a mixture of good fortune and some help from my Dad. I’d carried some of that debt for almost a decade and it’s crippling. 

Still have a bit left now (more than a lot of people would be comfortable with), but I’m chipping at it with overpayments every month and hope to be completely debt free in 12/18months (mortgage aside) 

looking back, I can’t believe it got to where it was and consider myself very fortunate that it didn’t pull me under. 

Hope it all works it ok for you. 

Well done on getting sorted mate. Same goes for you @villan-scott

I've been there as well.... not quite as bad as you @wazzap24 but at the time (about 15 years back) it was about a years salary owed on credit cards. Caused by trying a live a lifestyle that I couldn't afford. I was drawing cash out on credit cards to go out clubbing and to pay for petrol! I went through a cycle of about 2 or 3 'consolidation loans' as well to get things in order. Eventually a change of job and a substantial increase in my salary sorted me out. 

I'm now the opposite - I hoard money away like a old miser! I never want to have to worry about about money again so i'm almost too cautious now with spending.

I need to find a balance! 

 

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On 26/04/2021 at 22:15, Chindie said:

My house is a state, as well as myself. There's crap everywhere, I've not vacuumed in months... I just can't be arsed. And that's going for everything really. It just all seems pointless.

I did a post a few pages back about my apartment and how it being messy was getting me down. I cleaned it and it made me feel so much better. One room at a time. Break it down into manageable chunks. I started with the en-suite. Got that spick and span and that was it. Done for the day. Next day it was the hall. One room and one day at a time. 

I've tried to stay on top of it since and while its not a show home anymore, its a lot better than it was. 

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16 minutes ago, Xela said:

I did a post a few pages back about my apartment and how it being messy was getting me down. I cleaned it and it made me feel so much better.

Told you it would!   :)

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1 hour ago, Xela said:

Well done on getting sorted mate. Same goes for you @villan-scott

I've been there as well.... not quite as bad as you @wazzap24 but at the time (about 15 years back) it was about a years salary owed on credit cards. Caused by trying a live a lifestyle that I couldn't afford. I was drawing cash out on credit cards to go out clubbing and to pay for petrol! I went through a cycle of about 2 or 3 'consolidation loans' as well to get things in order. Eventually a change of job and a substantial increase in my salary sorted me out. 

I'm now the opposite - I hoard money away like a old miser! I never want to have to worry about about money again so i'm almost too cautious now with spending.

I need to find a balance! 

 

We’re heading the right direction. The mortgage DIP is done and passed today. He’s putting in the full app tomorrow for us, which should be all good. Then the valuation, most likely a desktop looking at comparable evidence. Hoping it all comes through ok. 

We’ve already made a few pacts about saving and not using the cards etc. Saving around £700 a month with the consolidation there really should not be any need to!!

Looking forward to the weight being lifted. Fingers crossed. 

Thanks @Xela I feel better for having the wheels in motion, and knowing that I’m not alone. 

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It's really sad how cruel people can be. When they sense or learn that you are struggling they smell blood.

Quote

Albion Rovers’ David Cox to retire after alleged mental health taunt

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2021/apr/30/albion-rovers-david-cox-quits-football-after-alleged-mental-health-taunt

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On 29/04/2021 at 20:04, villan-scott said:

We’re heading the right direction. The mortgage DIP is done and passed today. He’s putting in the full app tomorrow for us, which should be all good. Then the valuation, most likely a desktop looking at comparable evidence. Hoping it all comes through ok. 

We’ve already made a few pacts about saving and not using the cards etc. Saving around £700 a month with the consolidation there really should not be any need to!!

Looking forward to the weight being lifted. Fingers crossed. 

Thanks @Xela I feel better for having the wheels in motion, and knowing that I’m not alone. 

Had great news today and found out TSB have offered our mortgage. Broker submitted the app Friday. Was picked up today, desktop valuation came in fine, and offered already. Fantastic quick turnaround. Delighted. 

Just awaiting the solicitors to get it all sorted now. 

Can’t wait for the release of getting these debts paid off. 

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On 29/04/2021 at 09:16, StefanAVFC said:

Struggling recently. 

Lockdown, working from home, partner having a tough time at work, living with my partner's parents, injured so can't play football or squash, barely leaving the house.

Someone may have already asked the question,  but have you spoken about this to anyone else apart from on here?  Its the hardest thing to do,  but if you can talk to somebody I'm sure you'll find it helps.   I was struggling a few years ago and mentioned it to someone at work.  They arranged for me to see a councilor in work time and just talking to someone who wouldn't judge and just listened and talked me through what I was saying.  It helped.  Don't get me wrong there are days where life just gets me down but they are fewer than they used to be.   

If you need to talk,  I'm here for anyone who needs to vent or just needs an ear. 

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41 minutes ago, Vive_La_Villa said:

Taking some time whilst meds kick in. Feel so sleepy. Work are being very supportive and It’s a massive help as I really worried about how I would cope. 

Well done for telling them, it's much easier said than done and most employers really will want to help.

Over half my life, starting as a kid, I've really struggled with mental health and suicidal thoughts and the entirety of me talking about it to anyone is a couple of posts on here. Is anyone else in a similar situation? I decided long ago I will never tell my family as I've heard them deride mental health issues for years and I don't see what I have to gain from them knowing. Similar to my friends. I feel like telling them the truth now will just make them feel guilty and I know it wont make me feel any better. Tbh for about 10 years of my life the only thing that kept me alive was guilt at the thought of putting my family through another personal tragedy.

I also ended up getting in a bad situation with payday loans a few years ago and was too afraid to tell anyone. It all started because I was afraid to ask my dad for about £500 an ex housemate screwed me on when we moved out as I knew it would just result in lots of tutting and the assumption I spent all my money getting pissed. The end result was I spent about £25k in interest over a few years and I only kept my head above water as I moved to higher paid jobs a few times when I was right on the edge. No one in my life has any idea about any of it. Again, I kept quiet as I heard so much judgement over the years about these morons using payday loans etc and I didn't want to ask for help when vulnerable just to be berated. I have nothing to gain from telling them about this either as again I just know they'd feel guilty.

I guess my point is for people to be conscious about how they judge other people in trouble as, with someone like me, who doesn't like to ask for help anyway you risk making them completely shut off. 

 

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8 hours ago, Vive_La_Villa said:

Taking some time whilst meds kick in. Feel so sleepy. Work are being very supportive and It’s a massive help as I really worried about how I would cope. 

Take it easy. My meds make me sleepy but it lessens over time.  Sometimes sleeping is part of the healing process.  You become mentally exhausted and your mind needs that down time.  There are very few illnesses that aren't helped by sleep, rest and taking a break from life's worries.   

Keep us updated. 

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3 hours ago, Mandy Lifeboats said:

Take it easy. My meds make me sleepy but it lessens over time.  Sometimes sleeping is part of the healing process.  You become mentally exhausted and your mind needs that down time.  There are very few illnesses that aren't helped by sleep, rest and taking a break from life's worries.   

Keep us updated. 

Problem is I try to sleep just to avoid life.  But there’s only so much of it you can do. 

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