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H

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  • Location
    Birmingham
  • Interests
    Villa, music, art, writing

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  1. I've renewed and as long as finances allow it, I always will. I have a great seat, it's been my seat since the Holte was made all seater, and I really don't want to lose it!!
  2. It surprises me how many people here have experience of mental health, although I wonder whether it's just that sufferers are more drawn to internet forums because self-esteem and confidence and social skills aren't in evidence and people can't actually see you. I was diagnosed with recurrent clinical depression some eight years ago and suffered pretty badly for around four years. I had a bit of a breakdown in 2010 and that was probably my worst point. I had lots and lots of different counselling and found none of it helpful. It didn't help that the NHS kept shutting down all the clinics and moving the counsellors around so practically every time I went for a session, I saw somebody different and had to tell them my story all over again. I was also tried on three different types of antidepressants throughout a year or so and none of them made any difference - at which point my doctor just told me I was probably in the 1% or so of people that medication wouldn't work on so she just took me off them completely. Hence the breakdown so that was helpful... I finally got back on track and things were okay for a few years. In January of this year it all came crashing down again and I had a really awful two or three months. I finally decided to go back to the doctor, was put on a fairly high dose of Sertraline and referred for more counselling. The medication really seems to be working this time around and I'm feeling pretty good right now. I don't find counselling helpful but I'm willing to give it a go - however, it's a good job I'm feeling better because there's a seven month waiting list even for a first appointment which to me seems utterly ridiculous. Anyway, now I start each day afresh, I take it one day at a time and concentrate on the day ahead rather than what happened yesterday or what might happen tomorrow. Different things work for different people and if your medication isn't working out, don't be afraid to get it changed because this particular medication has had a major effect on me where three others didn't. Oh, and don't self medicate with alcohol because all that does is bring on massive sleep loss which really impacts on your overall mood during the day. I still drink far more than I should but I don't drink at home anymore and my sleeping pattern has improved dramatically. Bad days can be really bad but they do end and a new day does begin. All you can do is get through that bad day and keep starting again.
  3. H

    General Chat

    I've got one too so I don't think they're that rare!
  4. Again, it works both ways though. Don't you think if a woman messaged a man she could just as easily be blanked by him, regardless of the message she sends? It is very much the case that if you're getting 50 messages from 50 different men a day, of course you're going to filter through them. For me, it's not really about them sounding different, it's just about giving me something to respond to. I fully understand the low confidence thing because I have it myself. That means though that if I plucked up the courage in the first place to message a guy, I'd at least attempt to engage him in conversation with something a bit more for him to go on than 'hello'.
  5. When I was younger, I actually bought that on a card and thought it was really uplifting. Now I just think it's a pile of old toss
  6. I was thinking this myself after reading the above comments. Surely after losing someone or suffering some major tragedy, you'd be more likely to think there couldn't possibly be a God than suddenly thinking there must be a God to help me through this?
  7. If West Brom score the first goal then it's all over. A draw would be a decent result, a win would certainly be better but I think unlikely. I thought we'd lose the last couple of games too though so what do I know.
  8. I often feel quite envious of people who have a faith. Anything that helps you through really tough times has got to be a good thing.
  9. I have my own typing business if anyone needs a CV doing
  10. I really don't think that's the case with sites like POF. You only need to scroll through the profile photos to see that and that goes for the men and the women. However, if someone is low on confidence and trying to be polite, that's all very well but you can't possibly think someone is going to reply if you merely say 'Hello'? You don't need to act like a tit, just ask a question or comment on one of the interests the person you're contacting has. Men surely are aware that these women are going to get more than one message off many different guys so they're immediately going to be filtered out if their message doesn't actually contain anything. And if they think the woman is going to respond purely based on their photo and a word, they can't be that low on confidence...
  11. I'm terrified of the people I love dying but not about dying myself. Well, I'm scared of dying depending on how it happens but I'm not scared of death itself. What's to be scared of? You won't experience it because you'll be gone. It's a nice thought rather than a scary one. As I said, it's far worse to lose someone than to cease existing yourself.
  12. I mainly use Twitter for work but my personal is @Helen_Villa44 if you want to add!
  13. Definitely not the latter, I'd hate that! I had many, many messages that simply said 'Hello, how are you' and I ignored them all. I mean, come on, make a slight effort! I'm not your normal run of the mill female I don't think so maybe my answer isn't the norm but a cheeky line would probably make me cringe so I'd go for the introduction (if it was of interest) or just something perhaps based on my own profile to show they had actually read it rather than were just contacting every single new female in the area that registers (which does seem to happen!). So, maybe if I'd mentioned music or football they could comment on that, ask who I supported and who they supported, or what bands they were in to. The two guys I spoke to most from PoF, the first had started with a conversation about music and that the bands I'd listed sounded like his record collection which appealed to me, and the second was talking about Birmingham and pubs etc in the city centre, asking if they were still any good. It's pretty basic stuff but I'd much rather that as a conversation starter than 'You look well fit'.
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