My mates dad has been driving convoys of old vans to be used as ambulances to Palestine for years, he's well travelled in Muslim countries and paints a very different picture to the one you do, but I accept I don't have first hand experience.
I think millions of Muslims just want to live peaceful and happy lives, and although events in Palestine, Iraq and Afghanistan have led many to conclude that western governments have got it in for them - most don't want any more violence.
When we realise that circumstances drive ideas, then we might begin to solve many of the problems. But if you start and end with the point of view 'their religion is nutty', then you're just part of the problem, not the solution.