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I'm a dad, we have no idea. And:

Out of interest when was the last time you had your hard drive checked?

They'll be testing him for George's Marvelous Medicine.

Welcome back Deisler

It was nice to have a conversation on here without somebody being racist...

He's not even in the top 10 of worst midfielders we've had during the past decade.

Honestly think he is one of the worst midfielders I've seen for this club the last 30 years.

A small price to pay for great grandad stealing apples from his lordship's orchard.

Well if I had never seen Grealish play and he was coming from a foreign league then I would be very sceptical like I am with Luiz. I guarantee most people on here have never saw him play except them clips Bigger name players have crashed in the Premier League before never mind a youngster. Lucas went to Liverpool with a similar reputation and he was garbage for about 3 years before he had to change his game to become a destroyer. Anderson also was one of hottest prospects in the world Just think people need calm down about the guy and let him settle

People are getting too overexcited about him? Maybe. Would you say people got overexcited about Grealish? Here's my take.. Grealish played less in two seasons at a comparable age, being one year younger than in Luiz's case. He didn't have niggling injury problems either. Grealish played 16 matches in our relegation season. They were all defeats. Think he might hold the record for worst season as a result. Grealish had a successful Toulon tournament, winning the thing, but so did Douglas Luiz, who was also named player of the tournament. I think while Grealish was more accomplished and established at the age Luiz finds himself at now, there are certainly some parallels. At age 21, Luiz is captain of Brazil's under 23 side. I think it fair to say in recent years Brazil is a much more successful side than England or Ireland. I am hopeful that we have signed an absolute pearl here. From the very little I've seen of him, Ampadu and Phillips, I'm thinking we got the best of the bunch.

Am I the only one thinking it's a bit weird how long it takes us to sign Marvelous, while spotting more links to Santa Maria and Phillips? Probably just rubbish rumours, but it's a bit odd

I think they're struggling with his medical because he keeps slide tackling the doctors when they try to check him over.

As a local constituency MP, Corbyn was OK. He could follow his desire to focus on Islington interest things like talking to the IRA, Hamas, whoever, or hailing Chavez in Venezuela and it didn't matter. But as a leader, and even more so as a potential prime minister, that "judgement" does matter. That world outlook is far more significant. It's not just a talking point for some posh Londoners to cogitate over free range cocaine and organic quinoa dinner parties. He could as a local MP, work to help his constituents with whatever problems they had with the Gas Board or the council and all was well with the world. He could rebel frequently on all sorts of things, and it didn't matter. Right or wrong, he could indulge his views, for the good or for the bad. He could talk to folk on a calm level and appear human and decent and eccentric and it didn't matter, it helped a few folk feel better about things, feel their consciences were a little clearer, perhaps. But as a leader where competence and judgement are critical, he's no sort of candidate at all. His instincts are awry by a long way on too many things. He can't bring his party with him. He deigns not to involve himself with the media and then people wonder why most of the media is not overly kind to him. By not "playing the game" he's not helping his party, or his chances. It's not the media's doing that he's not romping ahead in the polls against a succession of utterly appalling, dreadful, woefully bad tory opponents - it's his fault, his responsibility, his burden. He's got his supporters, and fair play to those who like or rate him, but too much of the country simply don't for his, or Labour under him, to ever get elected as Government. He's an asset (much as he won't like it) for the tories, and more horror from them. When even his closest friends and long-standing supporters like Abbott and McDonnell describe car crash and are worried about the direction, there's clearly more than the media to be looking at. He's an incompetent arse.

I still see us getting Benrahma. Actually I doubt we’ll get another winger if it wasn’t him or someone in his caliber. This could go to the deadline day. I don’t see us getting Maupay though.

Let’s save ourselves some money and get Joel Valencia as he will no doubt be worth £20 million in a years time

Everton sign Moise Kean from Juve for about the same money as they sold Gueye to PSG in. I think they got the snake in for £8m too. Seems like smart business to me.

I don't think anyone thinks he is. I think everyone has unanimously said the story is bollocks. The discussion is hypothetical. And quite an interesting one, imo.

Pine if we're tabling it.

I’m late to the table, but Killing Eve season one is brilliant

I don't why you even entertain conversation with these walking placentas.

His injury record isn’t great though.

The main 3 performances are brilliant Think Chernobyl will get best show, the kid who plays Corey wise best actor and arquette best actress

I've gone for him at present. Maybe some bps too with him intercepting a lot with his relentless energy.

Of course it it’s, he’s halfway through his medical. Should be done next week!

Butland. Benrahma. Think that will be that. Can see Smith going for the JK approach at Plop and the ‘false 9’ with Jota and Ben being able to play up top if needed. Plus Jimmy as back up.

Has it ever happened? I hadn't realised that the points system is actually for the FA to then sponsor your work permit, as opposed to actual work permit conditions. I always thought it weird the law had such detailed provisions for footballers! With this being the case, I'd be astonished if they haven't already sent their sponsorship letter as he has been added to Fantasy Football. I know it sounds silly, but you'd think the PL and FA would be in close contact about this and it's an official site. Also seem to remember a player appearing on the site before being announced earlier in the summer. Might be wrong though.

Thankfully Son is suspended for our game. Small silver linings etc.

Butt Land!

Good tackles. I’m already for the frustration when most of them are declared fouls against the ‘big’ clubs.

We didn't. We had one for Veretout but Xia sold it to pay for his weekly Aldi shop.

Same way that Villa held all the cards but paid through the nose for Mings.

I like that team, except I'd have Engels over Konsa, then I think it's our strongest team. People saying Jota over Trezeguet, personally I'm still not sure on him, preseason he's looked very good but he didn't look that great for the last two seasons in the Championship and Trezeguet has a lot more pace to hit Spurs on the counter. Kalinic over Steer is harsh on Steer maybe, but Kalinic has played at the highest level for Croatia and if he isn't moved on I expect he might get his chance with a new defence but I'm not sure (still really hoping we get Butland and pay the money towards the end of the window). I would imagine we'll try to hit Spurs on the counter by quick short passes rather than being too direct, though Wesley does give us that option if we need it.

Classic.

or death.

Shudder to think that a Professor of Applied Economics might know more on a subject than a journalist. I think we've all had enough of these bloody experts thank you very much.

Problem with pre-season is people can hang on to their delusions for weeks on end. Reality checks coming up in T minus 11 days! (Edit: having said that, Hourihane is 28, has 300+ professional games under his belt, and knows the club. Douglas definitely has more potential, but he's a rough diamond.)

Lampard’s a smart cookie and it’s timed well (what with their transfer embargo) for him to reinvent Chelsea. I think the likes of Hudson-Odoi, Mount and Abraham will have excellent seasons if they can stay injury free etc. I don’t know if I’d go as far as to say they’ll win the league but I think they’ll be in the top 3 or 4.

Such a great show. Brilliantly written.

Players that need a loan Bree, Suliman, Clarke, JDH, COH, Ramsey, RHM and possibly Davis and Green depending on if we sign a striker/winger. Players that we need to sell Thor, Tshibola, Hogan, Kalinic if we sign a keeper.

Had to google him . It seems like he used to like interfering with his maids. So yes, it’s an honour to be likened to the great man himself.

The conversation wasn't "should we sack Dean Smith and hire Roy Hodgson"

No way Konsa and Trezeguet are ahead of Engels and Jota

Its close to it

People love to hate, but hate to praise.

Time to start this round Villa Park I think:

Is it just me, or are our pre-season fixtures rather less strenuous than they might be? Some of our competitors seem to be testing themselves against more serious opposition.