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Things You Don't "Get"


CrackpotForeigner

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  • 3 weeks later...

Ellie Gouldings face

 

People who think Ellie Goudling is really fit.

She really isn't.

I'm right on, and believe in empowerment and all that Jazz, but she really should think about the clothes she wears. Put it away, love!

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Ellie Gouldings face

 

She is a sort of British Taylor Swift - over-produced, synthetic, whinging, tripe.

Packaging her with the big stupid plastic hair and the rest of over-sexualised BS does her no favours because it just emphasises her physical shortcomings.

As Lauryn Hill sang - she needs to get out of those boxes.

But I suppose there might be plenty of homely girls out there who identify with her.

 

 

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Ellie Gouldings face

 

She is a sort of British Taylor Swift - over-produced, synthetic, whinging, tripe.

Packaging her with the big stupid plastic hair and the rest of over-sexualised BS does her no favours because it just emphasises her physical shortcomings.

As Lauryn Hill sang - she needs to get out of those boxes.

But I suppose there might be plenty of homely girls out there who identify with her.

 

 

As pop poppets go, Ellie is a long way behind Pixie Lott, who looks cute but I reckon she knows how to take a good length. I also have a liking for the one who looks like a chubby distressed panda from Little Mix. 

Current favourite of mine is Rita Ora. I bet she's filthy. Definitely not the type of girl to invite round your parents for Sunday lunch. She;d be making cock jokes before trying to toss you off under the table. Ahhh Rita! 

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Ellie Gouldings face

 

She is a sort of British Taylor Swift - over-produced, synthetic, whinging, tripe.

Packaging her with the big stupid plastic hair and the rest of over-sexualised BS does her no favours because it just emphasises her physical shortcomings.

As Lauryn Hill sang - she needs to get out of those boxes.

But I suppose there might be plenty of homely girls out there who identify with her.

 

 

As pop poppets go, Ellie is a long way behind Pixie Lott, who looks cute but I reckon she knows how to take a good length. I also have a liking for the one who looks like a chubby distressed panda from Little Mix. 

Current favourite of mine is Rita Ora. I bet she's filthy. Definitely not the type of girl to invite round your parents for Sunday lunch. She;d be making cock jokes before trying to toss you off under the table. Ahhh Rita! 

Sounds like she passed the audition for a starring role in your fantasy-life.

Be careful your carpal tunnel syndrome doesn't flare up again.:)

 

 

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Have a like for the use of carpal tunnel. Most would have played it safe with a sprain / RSI joke, but a wordsmith of your standing wouldn't settle for that :)

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